Racism (aka, here we go again): Part II

After the previous blog entry that I made, there were more comments made. I can no longer access the note, because the author has since blocked me on Facebook. Her last comment was this:

M: "[me], there is no claiming--it is a bona-fide fact. The old "land without people for a people without land" rears its head again. The concept that a place cannot exist unless it is an established, fixed nation, is a modern and Western idea. Yes, the British came, drew in boundaries, drew some maps, and said "THIS IS PALESTINE," but that does not alter the fact that a people had lived there in a settled state for centuries prior. What is a country, other than a collection of people with a similar cultural identity? Which is precisely the thing that Israel tries to tell the world--that we are just like Jordanians, or Lebanese, when we do, in fact, have our own culture and can't simply assimilate where we're thrown (the refugee camps in both of those countries are more than ample evidence of this). To deny an entire population an identity is a denial of humanity--and it is something that I would never even fathom doing. How can there be respect between two people if there is an insistence that their family's past history are merely "claims?" And it is precisely this lack of respect that forces me to block you, [me]. I don't mind disagreements--I WELCOME them, I want to talk these things out--but I cannot continue a relationship with anyone who clearly has very little respect for me, my family, or my life's journey. Adieu, adieu."



-------------------------------------
I can't reply to her on Facebook, because she has blocked me completely, so I will reply here:

Yes, M, you are correct-- there were people who had lived in areas before the British came in and drew borders-- borders that created a country, including the people who were within the borders and excluding those who were not.
A country is not a collection of people with a similar cultural identity, it is a place created by borders. Take the country of America-- that is a country, however if you take one person from the following states: NY, VT, VA, FL, IL, TX, MS, and CA and look at their cultural identities, they are completely different. Heck, take one person from New York City, one from Mount Vernon, one from Woodbourne, and one from Rochester and they will have different cultural identities, yet Mount Vernonites are not declaring themselves a separate country or stating that they have a unique cultural identity and therefore cannot possibly be "thrown into" the surrounding cities or towns (delineated by boundaries). Sorry, that argument does not hold water.

No one is claiming that your family and its history are "claims," however the group of people today who call themselves Palestinians DID NOT EXIST-- yes, I said it-- DID NOT EXIST-- until after Israel was created.
There was a group of people during the Biblical times known as Plishtim, or Philistines, however they are not today's modern-day Palestinians.



M, I too welcome debate and discussion, and unfortunately that is not going to happen between you and me because you have closed that avenue of discussion. You claim that I have very little respect for you, your family, or your life's journey, however you seem to not be willing to accept historical facts.

I wish you good luck in your life and hope that eventually you will get to a point that you are open enough to see other sides that may not agree with yours.

Racism (aka, here we go again...)

A friend of a friend just posted a link to an article with the comment, "She says it much more eloquently than I ever could."

The article, found here, concerns the NYC MTA's decision to allow ads that say, “In any war between the civilized man and the savage, support the civilized man. Support Israel. Defeat Jihad.” to be put up in 10 subway stations within New York City.

I agree, the ads are inflammatory-- and are meant to be. I think there are other ways of saying things, and, no I don't believe that all Muslims are bloodthirsty barbarians (or savages, to use the ad's wording).


This is the discussion that followed on the comment thread (note: I have changed the commentor's names to first initials, except mine which I have labeled "me"); M is the friend of the friend:

D: Great article, THANKS!!!
D: Zionist racism -- a redundancy? -- is rarely confronted with such eloquence
M:  I agree. I'm terrible. All I keep thinking is that I'm tired being called all these stupid names because I basically exist. I've been really quiet about this whole debacle for that reason. I'm glad there are people who are much more level-headed than I am.

D: I just had an extended e-kerfuffle with a prominent "liberal" film scholar. The guy finally showed himself as a racist, claiming that the UN had been bought by Arab money. This profound neurosis runs deeper every day. It must be confronted, which I usually do by calling my interlocutor a twat.
D: We're about to nuke Iran and few people care..
M: If the UN had been bought by Arab money, the UN is sure doing a crappy job keeping up their part of the bargain, no?
S: It's appaling, this whole thing - I'm kind of surprised the MTA allowed these to be posted - I understand the free speech issue at play in all of this, but these are just plain horrible. Would the MTA let the Westboro Church post an ad, too then?
M: I do wonder if we really are gonna nuke Iran... the US has been threatening it for years now.  
M: Sara, the MTA had been fighting it for a while, and originally told the organization that they couldn't go up. It got taken to court and, in the words of the MTA spokesperson, "their hands are tied."
E: These ads are vile. I say this as a human secularist, as an American, and as a person of Jewish descent. There is nothing in them I can agree with or support. Yes, they absolutely have the right to say it, but freedom of expression is not freedom of consequence of expression. This is the very wrongest way to have this conversation. I agree that we owe ourselves, future generations and America a chance to have this conversation in a meaningful and hate-free way.
Me: While I agree with the right to free speech and that the ads are inflammatory, I have a very big problem with a basis of her article. Ms. Sarsour wrote, "Geller elaborated that there is no Palestine – a view not held by most Americans." Whether or not most Americans hold the view that there is a place called "Palestine," the fact is-- there hasn't been since 1948, when the British Mandate of Palestine ended. Just because many people believe something does not make it true-- the world isn't flat, is it?

My friend's father can correctly say he was born in Palestine-- indeed, he was, when the area he was born in was under the British Mandate of Palestine. No one born since May 14, 1948, can say that he or she was born in Palestine, nor can he/she claim to be a Palestinian-- can anyone born in Massachusetts claim to be British, because at one time Massachusetts was a British colony? No, because the British colony of Massachusetts no longer exists.
D: Palestine was stolen via terrorist acts -- ask Rahm Emanuel's daddy, a former Irgun terrorist who shot babies. So you have old folks walking around with keys to their now bulldozed homes. Telling them to wake up and smell the coffee is just plain immoral. There are UN resolutions that call it illegal, too.
[note: D combined and deleted some of his original comments; each new comment is marked with a "-." the original of this was:
-Palestine was stolen via terrorist acts -- ask Rahm Emanuel's daddy, a former Irgun terrorist who shot babies.
-And so you have old folks walking around with keys to their now bulldozed homes. Telling them to wake up and smell the coffee is just plain immoral.
-There are UN resolutions that call it illegal, too.
-Marek Edelman fought Nazis in the Warsaw Ghetto and, as a Universalist, claimed the PLO had a right to fight against Zionist oppression
-This issue ain't going away. Thank goodness for Israeli youth -- they're moving Left.]   
Me: There are lots of individuals that I can name who have argues on both sides, regardless of the issue.
In terms of infants-- would you like me to start naming the babies who have been killed in terror attacks?  This was not meant to turn into a pissing contest of who has done more wrong to who and who is more in the right. I brought up a historical fact, and you turned it into "Here are examples of the bad Zionists who stole Palestine." I agree that there was a place called Palestine, however I also state that it no longer exists. Simply having existed once upon a time does not make something exist at this moment. To go back to my earlier example-- what about the British colonies that no longer exist as British colonies? Can I, having born in an area that at one time was under British rule, claim British nationality? Or if I was born in Turkey, can I claim to be Ottoman?

And what do you say to and about people like me, my husband, and the other medic on duty two nights ago who, when we got a call to an Arab village for injured people, got out of our nice warm beds and in the middle of the night went to take them to the hospital? The Red Crescent was supposed to take them (there is a Red Crescent ambulance station in that area, by the way) and didn't show up until 20 minutes after we got there (in our defense, we wanted to take whoever we could asap-- the patients wanted to wait for the Red Crescent, and then decided to go with us). We took those patients to the hospital of their choice. And when they got there and saw that there was no doctor on duty (don't ask me why), they decided they wanted to go to another hospital. And we took them.

So don't only thank goodness for Israeli youth-- thank goodness for the people who don't care if their patients are Muslim, Christian, Jewish, Arab, Israeli, or anything else and treat them regardless. (you do know that homicide bombers and terrorists get treated as well, right?) 
S: Yikes - that's really unfortunate, Margo. I guess it's nice to know the MTA tried...still doesn't really make it any better, though. I wish people didn't feel the need to resort to hateful name calling in subway advertisements as opposed to, well, an actual discussion. These kind of reactions harken back to New York a century ago, when instead of Palestinians, it was Italians and Irish...
[D posted and deleted the following comments; again, each new comment is marked by a "-":
-Lauren: you have a bizarre perspective. Operation Cast Lead? if you think the casualties on the Israeli side come anywhere near to the number o Palestinian dead, then you are, sorry, wrong.
-Your rage is irrelevant.]
Me: Daniel, I'm going to stop this now not because I don't have what to say or don't have facts to back what I say up, but because it's just going to turn into something ugly and hateful.

You have your opinion and viewpoint, I have mine, and neither of us are going to change the other's. So let's just stop, because this is not helping any progress.
D:  Lauren: you have a bizarre perspective. Operation Cast Lead? if you think the casualties on the Israeli side come anywhere near to the number o Palestinian dead, then you are, sorry, wrong. Your rage is irrelevant. People are tired of filtering discussions about war crimes through Jewish sensitivity. Be sensitive, be angry, be self-righteous. The occupation is going to end with or without your help. Israel is in the driver's seat, as the fourth most powerful military presence on Planet Earth. The idea of symmetrical responsibility is a fetid lie. Americans are sick of spending $10M per day on the longest-running occupation in the world. And, yes, young people in Israel are joining enormous protests against their government -- I'm with them.


------------------------------------------------
My FB status:
[Lauren] would like to reiterate: Palestine no longer exists. It existed from 1920-1948; no longer. You cannot claim nationality or citizenship of a place simply because it USED to exist; I cannot claim British nationality or citizenship simply because where I was born was once under British colonial rule...



I debated replying to D with a list of babies murdered by terrorists, of names of people who "were on both sides" of a given issue, about the reasons for Operation Cast Lead and inform him exactly where the fire was getting shot at Israel from. I restrained myself. Not because I wanted to-- I want to rip him a new one-- but because there is no purpose in a one-sided debate. Someone wants to actually talk, I'm up for it. Someone wants to tell his side and insist he is right and throw out random facts-- wasting his time and mine.

I did like my point about someone being born in a formerly British area claiming British citizenship because they were born somewhere that USED to be under British rule. (British friends, field day with that one?)

Cookies! And cooking/baking seasonally

See last week's post for details...

I baked cookies. Lots of cookies. Honey cookies, zebra cookies (chocolate with powdered sugar), and cheese danishes. Last time I baked the chocolate cookies I sent some with my cousin back to the army.

This time I made about 30 2-inch cookies of each honey and zebra (now made with real zebras! ...just kidding...) and probably about the same number of cheese danishes (half plain, half with raisins). We went to my [adopted] family for Rosh Hashana and brought the cookies over. We had wanted to pack some up beforehand for my cousin to take back to the army, but we didn't have good containers, so I just packed up the leftovers-- he's happy :)





And now on cooking seasonally.

Israel, like many other countries, grows fruits and vegetables. And like on other countries, fruits and vegetables have seasons-- meaning that sometimes they can be found, sometimes they can't, and sometimes they are more expensive and other times they are less expensive.

Eli and I like to make at least one vegetable dish for Shabbat-- we make a lot, and then we just eat it for the rest of the week. We generally go to the shuk [open air market] for some vegetables, spices, rolls, random other things. This is the conversation that ensues pretty much every week:
 -What vegetable do we want for Shabbos?
-I don't know...green beans/cauliflower/sweet potatoes/roasted vegetables...I don't know, whatever they have that's not expensive
-Ok...but what do you want?
-I don't know, see what they have.
And that is how we decide our vegetable dish for Shabbos.

Deciding dessert and side dishes:
We decide our dessert and side dishes based on what is leftover in the house. That's how we came up with Dead Fruit Cobbler. We had peaches and nectarines that were going bad, so we made Dead Fruit Cobbler-- with the dying/dead fruit.





I feel like this post was jumping around a lot. Sorry. My brain is thinking very fast and I'm hoping this came out somewhat coherent.

Foodness, part II

So far:
-Meat (corned beef made by my mother; thank you Mommy)
-Stuffing kugel
-Honey cookies
-Cauliflower
-Challah (3 kinds- zaatar; pesto-nutmeg; oregano and rosemary)
-Dead Fruit Cobbler

Still have to do:
-Zebra cookies (chocolate cookies with powdered sugar coating/topping)
-Cheese danishes
-Clean/straighten up the apartment.

Foodness

I'm in the mood to write.

I have the challah dough and the cheese danish dough rising outside, I started soaking the cauliflower (which I have to finish). I put away the roasted vegetables, and I guess I'll finish this later, after I have the cauliflower and stuffing kugels in the oven.

Then on to cookies...

Writing later.

"The chagim"

There is a time period in the Jewish calendar known as "the chagim," which is the pperiod of holidays that extends from the Jewish New Year (aka "Rosh Hashana") through Yom Kippur (aka "the Day of Atonement") until Sukkot (aka "Feast of the Tabernacles," or "the holidays where Jews build those little booths/huts in their backyards"). This is a period that is always in the fall, right after school begins. In NYC, school staff prays for Rosh Hashana and Yom Kiippur to fall on school days so they have extra vacation days; in Israel this is a period that causes a lot of backup. For example, deliveries.

I sent a lift. It's supposed to land a few days before Rosh Hashana; the guy already said to me, "Oh, nothing will happen with it until after Rosh Hashana." When I asked him if I could get it before Sukkot (about 2 weeks later), his answer was, "I'm not sure."

The chagim time period puts this country into a semi-slow-motion time period. While not everything comes to a halt, many things get considerably slowed down and it's perfectly accepted to say, "Well, it's the chagim...you know, things are busy...after the chagim for sure." Well, what good is that when you need things before?

Good thing I brought a new shirt back for Eli for Rosh Hashana instead of sending it on the lift.

"Honey, uh, did you get my gas mask?"

And his response: "Of course."
Add that to the list of conversations I didn't anticipate having with my husband.

As you can guess, we got gas masks. If you've been out of the loop and missed the news over the past months, Iran is getting more and more dangerous and unpredictable and this area of the world is getting more unstable. Rocket attacks are increasing again, and the Homefront Command (Pikud HaOref) is stepping up gas mask distribution. Just in case.


Back to Adventures of Lauren as She Goes to Get Her Gas Mask Kit.


The way it works: The post office is responsible for distributing the kits. The goal is to get them to as many people as possible, in the most efficient way. Therefore the post office has set up distribution locations around the country to encourage people to get their new (or first time) gas masks. If someone received a mask previously and had not returned it yet or did not have it to return, then he/she has to pay a 100 shekel fine in order to receive a new one. Eli and his parents and siblings had kits from before; his mom found all of them, so no fines :). I, on the other hand, never had one so I didn't have any to return.

Eli and I went with his mother, the old masks, and identification cards [teudot zehut] for the whole family (yay! *insert sarcasm HERE*) to the distribution center for our area and picked up our shiny new "protective kits" (aka, cardboard boxes with a rubber strap). For the uninitiated, gas masks come in different sizes-- small, medium, and large-- which were all conveniently on display. There was also a video running, showing how to put the masks on. Masks also come in baby kit. Baby kit is a little more complicated than the others, however babies can use bottles and pacifiers.

So Eli, his mom, and I went to the distribution center in a mall about a half hour away, and there were lots of people. They did it based on number (get there, take a number, wait/go off and do something until the 200-or-so numbers before yours are called...). We got 791. BUT (and here's a happy part) many people took two/found random earlier numbers, so someone gave us a number that was 120 numbers before ours-- and they were up to about 620. So we went from 791 to 671 in two seconds. We waited, we waited, then the security guard/person keeping order called our number (insert me meeting someone from my high school in between) and we went to get our shiny new kits! There was also a camera crew from somewhere filming this and this woman kept going, "Don't record me. I don't want my face on camera." And then as she was leaving she told the woman in charge, "I don't allow you to record me; I don't give you permission; Erase what you recorded." And it was amusing, because she was practically yelling at them.

Back to us. Eli's mom first gave in the old masks and the post office worker scanned them in (bar codes-- cool!) and gave Eli's mom new masks for everyone, plus her grandson (because he was listed on his mother's teudat zehut [identity card] and Eli's mom had it. And Eli got mine. Basically, if you're listed on a teudat zehut that someone brought to the distribution center, you could get one (even if you were not physically there). Eli, his mom, and I left with a bunch of labeled boxes in various sizes. Special.

Lest you think Israeli kids would have the patience to wait in line for more than a minute, fear not-- you are not wrong. There was an activity/coloring area for small children.

Adventures in the life of an olah...

The Hess truck's back, and it's better than ever. For Christmas this year, the Hess truck's here!

Ok, Hess doesn't exist in his country, and it's not Christmas. But I brought enough stuff back from America that it could very well be.

I'm back. Barely slept on the plane, so when Rita picked me up I came back and took a nap for a few hours. Showered. Ate. Now just trying to sort out a MagicJack issue and waiting for Eli to get back.

Tisha B'Av in America

I've been in Israel pretty frequently since 2008, and yet I've never been there for Tisha B'Av. I think that is the only...major Jewish something I haven't experienced in Israel yet.

Weird.

Like every Tisha B'Av, I go to shul [synagogue] and hear the Megillat Eichah [the Book of Lamentations] being read. Then I go home, try to stay up as late as possible so I will sleep late the next morning (so as to pass the day better...), go to sleep, try to figure out something to pass the time until it's nighttime and I can eat.

It seems like a pretty pathetic way to pass the day. I'm not a horrible faster, but I'm not usually great either. I get grumpy and snappish and just not a lot of fun to be around.

Tisha B'Av should be a day of mourning, reflection, and introspection. The Second Temple was destroyed because of baseless hatred, and you see all tons of articles and posts on Facebook written about how to increase the love within the Jewish community and "baseless love."

It;s hard to imagine the world with a Beit Hamikdash. Maybe that's a tragedy, and maybe that's also what we should be mourning, but I just...can't seem to get there.

Stuff

In the past approximately 20 days, I have spent an obscene amount of money. It's-- stuff we will use, and the things we are buying we can't get in Israel or are two to four times the price.

For example, I got a 12-cup muffin tin for $5, which is approximately 20 shekels. No way can I get that quality in Israel for 20 shekels. I got storage containers-- a set of Rubbermaid containers for, I think, $20. They are non-disposable, high quality storage containers. Good luck finding them in Israel. At almost any price.

Underwear that lasts more than 6 months. Socks that are comfortable and don't cost a fortune. Ziploc bags. A king-size sheet set for $30 (120 shekels); twin sets for $13 (52 shekels). $20 (80 shekel) jeans that look normal, fit comfortably, feel good, and are good quality, wooden puzzles for $8 (24 shekels).
I can continue with the food-- Devil Dogs, Ring Dings, English muffins, 3-lb. brick of American cheese, curly-edge non-cook lasagna noodles, granulated onion. I can just go on and on.

It's frustrating. There are lost of people who don't come to America every year and stock up on clothes, cheese, and ziploc bags. And I know that what we bought is going to last us for a LONG time, but it's still hard to look at the credit card bills (then think of that in shekels...) and justify it. I know that the amount of money I spent here is probably 1/3-1/4 of what I would have spent, had I bought these things in Israel (if I could even find them...) But it's frustrating to feel that disparity, just to look at numbers.

I spoke to occupational therapy students at the school I graduated from about occupational therapy in Israel, and they had a lot of questions. Inevitably the question of salary came up, and when I answered it, I'm pretty sure I (a) dissuaded a lot of them from wanting to live in Israel and work as an OT; (b) killed their day. Like in a previous post, the salary is very disappointing. It was very frustrating and shocking to them, as it was to me.


Do I really need ziploc bags? No, I can live without them. Do they make my life a heck of a lot easier? Definitely yes. 


It's frustrating that things-- almost everything-- heck, even some Israeli products!-- are less expensive in America. And I want to live in Israel and not rely on American products, but as far as I can remember, I have bought ONE item of clothing (excepting mitpachot) and TWO pairs of shoes (mine were dying and these were on sale). Why? Because I know that I can get the clothes I know I like at Old Navy (decent quality, very good prices) for about $5-$10 (20-40 shekels, depending on the sale). So why should I spend 50 shekels a shirt for something that is going to last me half the time (because the quality is lower)? I'll wait a couple of months, and someone will be coming in and will bring it to me.


Oh, and I just saw packing tape. That an packing boxes are two other things that are very expensive for inferior quality, or you can't really get them in Israel.




My mother-in-law (weird to use that term; I prefer Eli's mom) worked really hard to raise her kids Israeli and not have America be such a part of their lives (other than they are from there and have relatives who live there) and I feel like I've come in with this neon sign above my head that says, "American!" and have brought in more America in the year-and-a-half since I met them than they had in the approximately 17 years prior. I I kind of feel bad, because she tried really hard to not raise her kids American-- and no way would you look at them and go "Americans" but I don't, because I am American and my children will be American-- not the same way I am, nor the same way Eli is, but in their own way.

I want my kids to know the "oldies" and folk singers I was raised on. I want them to know the American anthem and Pledge of Allegiance, and to be able to say their Social Security numbers the same way they will know their Israeli identification number. I don't know how, but I want my children to feel their American identity as strongly as they will their Israeli; I have no idea how to do that, nor how it will play out. All this, of course, to be filed under "future."

"Loneliness is nighttime, waking up inside a cold and empty bed...then I'm reminded of what's beautiful..."

It's 7:30 am (Israel time...12:30 am NY time). I'm about to call my husband to wake him up. It's lonely, being half a world away from him. It is, as we put it, a game that we are not playing again.

Scratch that, I just woke him up sort of; he woke up about two minutes ago actually.

It's lonely, waking your husband up by phone half a world away.

Salary Comparisons Make Me Cry

In NY I make $55-130 per hour, working as a contract/independent therapist (salaried it varies depending on what area of practice you're in). In Israel I got offered 70 SHEKELS as a contract therapist.

And people ask my why I come to America to work. Because as an occupational therapist in Israel, I can't made a decent salary. As a single woman I could support myself-- sharing an apartment, bills, paying for food and transportation. But as a married woman, looking at my salary alone-- it can barely support myself and my husband, forget about any expansion of our family in the future.

As a school-based therapist working for Misrad Hachinuch I made about 55 shekels/hour, which is pretty good. And add in the vacation time and seemingly good hours and it seems like I have it pretty good. However, there were so many other things around it-- all the preparatory work that you do at home (treatment planning, reports, etc.), the continuing ed that you HAVE to go to that takes place in the evenings, the fact that you rarely get to meet with teachers/other staff-- that it was about 55 shekels for every hour that I was at my school (I think); I don't know how many hours I spent on the other things, in continuing ed, etc.

In a hospital that is looking for therapists they pay minimum wage. My husband, working as a security guard, makes that or maybe a shekel or two per hour more. That hospital has an excellent rehab department, which is why therapists are willing to work there, but they work there for a year or two and then leave because the pay is so bad. In a health fund they pay 25 shekels/hour (and just for more comparison-- a family friend who is a doctor get 37 shekels/hour).

Israel has socialized medicine, which is a major part of why healthcare pays so poorly. There is some sort of reform starting, or at least that's the rumor, but if you look at the numbers, something has got to change in order to make the salary in the health care system something that one could live on, as a family and not by working 80-hour workweeks.

Job hunt!

I am officially leaving Misrad Hachinuch [the Ministry of Education] at the end of this school year. It's not really built/designed for new therapists, especially those who weren't trained in the system here.
I worked in the school system in NYC, and it's very, VERY different. For starters, not every kid in special ed is eligible for every service the school provides. There is also a list of students who are supposed to receive each service, and they have become eligible for that service after having an evaluation by that kind of therapist. Once the student becomes eligible for that service, he/she is mandated to receive that service for a specified amount of time, a specific number of times per week. If the student does not receive services in the school because there is no therapist who can treat the student, the Board of Ed (BOE) sends home a letter that gives permission for the student to be treated outside of the school, in a private clinic that has an agreement with the BOE.

There is also an expectation that therapists act as teachers and many principals want the therapist to treat at least the entire class as a group once a week-- problem, when you have two hours for a class and 6 kids in the class who all need individual therapy or max in a pair. The kids can be treated in a group as a class, but it might not be as effective and won't address the students needs the best (note: I am talking about students who are in separate special ed schools because they cannot be in mainstream schools, either part-time or even in self-contained classes in a general ed school).

Do the kids gain from the class lesson? Yes. As much? I don't know.

So the job hunt is in progress. If anyone has any leads, let me know!

Employer/Empoyee Attitudes

Normally I do not post anything other than very generic information about my workplaces. I work in schools with students who have varying levels of disabilities and handicaps, and that's all I'm going to say-- not where my schools are, not what the names are, and not the types of disabilities and handicaps that my students have.

Yesterday I was driving back with Eli and his mom and we were discussing work and being an employee and how employers treat employees and expectations, etc.

I am now going to vent about a principal I know-- not necessarily a principal at a school that I work in or have worked in, but a principal that I know in a professional relationship. When I saw her school I was impressed by her attitude-- she seemed to care and be interested in developing the OT program at her school and seemed to value the therapists and her staff-- spoke highly of them and reflected pride. I now know her from the inside-- therapists talk.

She yells at staff members, has clear favorites, takes out her temper on staff, and does not project an attitude of growth in the school. From what I understand, she has pushed, and is really pushing, for the school to be more "normal"-- standard subjects should be taught, and more emphasis should be placed on academic learning rather than more functional things for the students. Great. But that's really on the side. The point of this post was to discuss employer's/supervisor's attitudes and employees attitudes.

A few examples:
There was a meeting that had been scheduled and the day of it was pushed to a slightly earlier time. That day a representative from the Teachers Union had come to the school to answer questions about a new contract that was signed for the schools system. One of the staff members from the school was in the teacher's lounge with a couple other people, talking to the representative about five minutes before the meeting was supposed to start. The principal came in and said to the staff member, "Don't you have a meeting?" The staff member replied, "Yes, it starts at ____, in five minutes." The principal snapped back, "Maybe you should have your feet on the ground and know when you have meetings!" and went into the bathroom. When the principal came out the staff member said to her, "[Principal's name], I did not deserve that." And the principal responded, "I had it up to here today!"

...to be continued...

Hi. Back again.

Well it's been a long...well, I haven't really been unpdating properly since about when I got engaged, so let's say...oh. Seven months. It's been a long seven months.

Which it actually has been. There have been a lot of changes in my life, aside from getting married and moving; that's only part of it.

Where to begin...

We're past the engagement.

Let's start with moving, because that's next. Eli slipped when he was helping me move and hurt his back, which semi-put him out of comission for a couple of weeks, at which point my mother came in. We moved my stuff to our apartment and had a lot of boxes for a while. (note: we are now down to 9, which are mostly/all books. Go us.) We also bought a closet and a bedroom set (bed, 2 nighttables)-- more on that later.

Oh, wait, interruption-- I was doing coverage one day a week at one of my school until December and that ended so I kept that day free to do wedding stuff.Back to moving.
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Moving into our apartment was kind of interesting. It was raining pretty hard, which was why Eli slipped, but aside from that the current tenant hadn't yet moved out. Fun! We agreed with the landlord that we were going to get the apartment on the first of the month; I had intended on moving in slowly over a couple of weeks until my mom came in, but my roommates and I found someone to replace me in the apartment starting the first of the month, so I moved out on the first. We spoke to the guy living in the apartment when we went to show it to Eli's mom (the month before we were supposed to move in) and the guy said, "Oh...I don't have a place to live yet, so if I need can I stay a little longer?"  We told him no, and he said, "Well I don't know if I'll have a place, I'm looking but nothing's come up, etc...." and we called the landlord and said this guy didn't seem like he was planning on moving out on time, and that we were moving in on the first. So the night before the first we called the guy living in the apartment to make sure he left/would be out by the first and he said he was still there and wasn't planning on leaving until sometime on the first, at least. We immediately called the landlord and told him that we just spoke to the guy and he wasn't planning on leaving until sometime on the first (and that we could move in from midnight, if we wanted, seeing as we technically had the apartment from then...). Fast forward to about 9:30-10 when we arrive at the apartment with my stuff and see...the landlord using HIS OWN truck to help this guy move out. Seriously?! Well, anyway-- we got the apartment in a horrible mess, dirt everywhere, cigarette butts lying around-- the guy's UNDERPANTS hanging in the bathroom (which we told him about and he took, thank goodness). Giant, giant mess. Which we semi-organized, etc., until my mom came.

Bedroom set: We wanted an in-between size bed that separates (standard beds in Israel are 80 cm wide, standard beds in America are about a meter wide, and we wanted a 90 cm bed because we decided that 80 cm is too narrow, but we would have a hard time fitting 1 meter beds in many Israeli bedrooms because they're all built smaller. So we went for the middle size, and we are happy with it :) ) We actually found the one we wanted in the size we wanted that separates on display so we asked about buying it and the store said ok. So we got it for less-- there were a couple of scratches that the store repaired-- and so we got a great bedroom set for under standard price. And they built one of the nightstands new for us because they only had one on display. We ordered mattresses from the same store. When we went to try out mattresses, the store had mattresses that were different on either side; they were very close and both comfortable and Eli said, "Too bad they don't come like this [meaning one side one thing and one side another]. The guy in the store was like, "Well, actually, I can order them like that for you." So we got cool mattresses! They delivered our bed when the mattresses were ready but not the nightstands so we called and asked where they were. In the end we got them-- and one was broken and we finally got the second one a week or two ago.

Family arriving/Pre-Wedding: My mom came in about ten days before the wedding and we went for the tasting with Eli's parents and his younger sister and youngest brother. My mom kind of hung out a lot until the rest of my family (dad, sisters, brother-in-law, and nieces) came in. My parents and younger sister stayed in the apartment with me, and my older sister and her family stayed with family friends.

The shabbat before the wedding: In Ashkenazi [Eastern European] Jewish tradition, the shabbat before the wedding there are two separate celebrations: the groom has an "aufruf," where he is called up to the Torah and candies are thrown at him, and the bride has a "shabbat kallah" where she celebrates with her female friends and family members. My shabbat kallah was at my old apartment, and my sisters and nieces came; my mom went to Eli's aufruf (there weren't really going to be people there for my mom to hang out/talk to who weren't my age-ish, and she would have felt kind of awkward).

Day before the wedding: Took off from work and ran around. Don't remember much of what I did. I went to my friends' apartment in the afternoon to get ready for the mikva-- before a Jewish woman gets married she goes to the mikva to make herself spiritually pure (not physically clean-- you do that before you go to the mikva!). Yay for jacuzzi tubs. And then that night went to the mikva with my friend for moral support (she took me to a mikva near her and her husband's apartment. More explanation on mikva here: mikvah.org) and stayed over at her and her husband's apartment with my younger sister.

Day of the wedding: My friends who I stayed over at took me to the Kotel in the morning. Something really cool that not too many people know about is that a bride and groom can drive straight up to the Kotel [Western Wall] and park in a parking area near the Kotel (provided there is enough space, say the guards). I came back to Eli's and my apartment and I had lots of free time until makeup and the siyur (when the photographer takes you on a photo tour thing and takes pictures of you). So I sewed the sleeves up and the buttons on. My younger sister did my hair (and it took all of a half hour, extra hair spraying included) and someone who lives nearby came and did my makeup, as well as my mom's, Eli's mom's, my sisters', and my best friend who came from NY for the wedding (thank you Sara!). Then I went for the siyur and to the hall.

Despite how much we wanted to have the chuppah on time it didn't happen. It was a half-hour late. On the upside, it was not due to either of us.  What else is there to say? It was wonderful.


..To Be Continued...

Post-Wedding Post

Well, we did it. Too late now...

Things went pretty well, I'd say. We're married. The last details got worked out, and eventually everyone got to the wedding hall. Pictures ran late, the chuppah started late, but the hasa'ah left on time at least :)

I need to do a proper post, but it's been such a whirlwind since the days before the wedding and until now-- it's Pesach in two days and I don't even have time to organize and clean tomorrow because I'm doing coverage in a skilled nursing facility!

We've both been sick, which isn't helpful, but b"H we are slowly getting better. More later.

Very frustrated and stressed

I am getting married in 2 days and (as far as I know) the caterer still doesn't have a number. He thinks 12 tables inside and 12 outside, but we're not going to need that many I think.

This is a little ridiculous. I know it's Israel and all, but still-- we need to give the caterer a number.

Next. Mikva.

In Judaism, there is something called "Taharat Hamishpacha," or the laws of family purity. One of the things involved in this is the woman going to the mikva (ritual bath). Before her wedding, every bride (even if she has been married before) goes to the mikva. Women generally go at night, except in America, brides generally go in the daytime (so the mikva is empty and it's relaxed, etc.). In Israel, brides go at night, with an appointment. So I am doing that. I am going to a mikva that my friend goes to, she said the mikva ladies are nice and it's not the nicest mikva in the world, but it's nice. So I is going at night.

And counting...

All I need is to arrange the hasa'ah. The bouquet I have an idea, and I think the rest is done.

For the shabbat kallah I have to just cook, and the shower is tomorrow. Things are coming together.

Finding My Place as an OT

In NY-- wait, let me back up.

How I became an OT (occupational therapist) starts before my older sister started college-- or maybe grad school, I don't remember which. She wanted to be a physical therapist (a PT), so I said, "Yeah, that sounds good. I'll be a physical therapist, too." So I decided to study physical therapy (PT) (not knowing much about it, just that people who hurt themselves or had strokes went. Like my Grandma, after she had a stroke).
I applied for a joint 5-year undergrad/graduate program in PT and got in. But I would have to take physics. People who know me know that math and I don't get along too well, and I won't do math if I can avoid it. Physics...math...pass. So I looked into occupational therapy (OT), because I didn't really know what the difference was (OT, PT-- there's a difference?) so I started talking to people and one OT told me that she had never met any OTs who wanted to be PTs but had met PTs who wanted to be OTs. That was a powerful statement to me so I decided to do OT. Volunteered, etc., got into OT school.

During OT school I decided that I wasn't going to work with kids, because I worked had with them enough and even though I was really good at it, enough. So I did my specialty in hand therapy and liked. I also really, REALLY liked working with stroke patients.

Fast forward to 2008, when I pass my OT exam and have to start looking for work. Decide to work in the school system because I get summers off, and it's with kids...and I work well with kids. I went to my first school and the other para-professional (OT, PT, SLPs) were fantastic to work with. The building not so fantastic to work in (as in, I got sick from the building). I transferred to two other schools and I was finally starting to find my place as an OT and feel like I knew something and I decided to make aliyah in the middle of the year. I went to ulpan and decided that for the next school year I wanted to work in the school system-- after all, I liked it in NY.

I tried to get in touch with the body of misrad hachinuch that deals with therapist placement but and all they said was, "Send a resume." So I went directly to misrad hachinuch to talk to them and got sent to a supervisor for special education. I explained to her what I did in NY and asked her about OTs in regular schools and she said that didn't exist and there were only special-ed only schools. So I went to a couple of schools. Didn't fit in too well, and it was just very tough to get into the system-- totally different than I was used to and thought. I stayed in one of the schools for this year and went to another school also.

I'm still not fitting in-- the principals don't see me differentiating myself as an OT in the school, bringing my qualities and.... I'm going to look into kupot cholim for next year, but I really want to work with special ed classes in regular schools.

...to be continued...

Shloofy time

It's after midnight. I'm tired. I need to go to sleep, considering I haven't done enough of that since I got back to Israel about 4 days ago.

But I haven't updated in a while, therefore I would like to update to let you all know that I am alive and kicking.

Real update when I can focus. But hi, everyone. I'm still here.

Rather, I'm back here.