When I Grow Up

or at least get married and have kids...not that that's in the immediate future. I'd like a guy first. Anyway.



There's a blog that I found called A Soldier's Mother written by a woman who made aliyah about 16 years ago. She knew then that her sons, at least, would serve in the army.

I'm not there yet, and please G-d, there will be peace before then and my children won't have to serve because there won't be a need for an IDF. But realistically, there probably won't be peace and there will be a need.

Is it fair for me to do that to them? Is it fair for me to move to Israel, knowing full well that I intend to raise my family there, and that my children will be going to serve in the IDF and protect and defend Israel and Jews all over with a chance that, G-d forbid, they will get injured or killed? Is it fair to impose that on them? It's my choice to move...now I'm in the US, a country that has a volunteer army (generalize it to mean any branch of the armed forces). If I stay here, my children will not be drafted; if they want to join the army , it will be their choice; it will not be forced on them, and no one will think them any worse of them or look down on them if they don't. But in Israel it's not really something that they will have a choice about. Yes, they will somehow be able to get an exemption if they really want to...but I'm not going to encourage it. Is that fair?


And on another somewhat related note, is it fair of me to leave my parents and family to move to Israel? Not like my mom doesn't worry here, but there she's more worried, more nervous. Is it fair to make my mom worry more? This is the part that really sucks...leaving family and worrying about them. Forget them worrying about me, I'm worried about them. What's Lis going to do? Yeah, she says she'll just have to learn to manage on her own, but it's going to be harder. It's little things I do for her, like making her food when she's running late or her laundry when I do mine even though it's more or letting her vent or running small errands...just little things.
And my mom. I'm really worried about her. Not that she's not worried about me, but as much as she's worried about me, I worry about her too. I help her a lot with things like schlepping and running up and down to get things or bring things and helping her with the computer, switching laundrys...just things that don't seem so big, but help her. My dad I'm not as worried about, but still. I help him with things like fixing things around the house. He'll manage-- they all will...but it doesn't make me feel any better.
I'm not the savior of the house-- by no means do I think I am. But I am home a lot, and am capable of doing things so I do.

Man, this sucks.

"...feelin' groovy..."

Not really. But there's a backstory...like many of my posts...

Like any good child of the 80's, I had parents who raised me and my sisters on their music in the car. That consisted of a lot of tapes (made from of records, because cars came with tape/cassette players and not record players) and the Oldies station-- 101.1 CBS FM (New York...I can't read/write/think that without hearing the tune in my head). " My mom likes Simon and Garfunkel (see their official website or the Wikipedia page for more info on them). So you would think that I would know their songs and recognize them when they, you know, were played on the radio and stuff.

Close...I knew their songs-- except I knew them in Hebrew. Do you understand how confusing it is to learn a song in Hebrew, think that that's the song-- it's in Hebrew, not English-- and then hear it on the radio IN ENGLISH?! My little brain was going"wtf?" (except not in those words because I didn't know them yet, and "wtf" wasn't an expression then). It took me a while to understand the concept of "covers." So, yes, I learned Simon and Garfunkel songs in Hebrew before I learned them in English.

Now why is this relevant?-- or in Hebrew-- ?איך זה רלוונטי-- "aych zeh relevanti?" Because I spent Shabbat reading words like:
טמפרטורה
סימפטומים
רלוונטים
דפורמציות
קונטרקטורות
(just like that-- no nekudot (vowels) the dots and lines under the letters, which make it easier to read)

Normally it's not so bad trying to read Hebrew. But here's the catch (and there's always a catch, especially when dealing with Israel or anything related)-- these words? ENGLISH! Watch:
טמפורטורה - tem-pu-ra-tura - temperature
סימפטומים - seemp-to-meem - symptoms
רלוונטים - reh-la-vahn-teem - relevant (plural)
דפורמציות - de-for-ma-tzee-yot - deformities
קונטרקטורות - con-trac-tu-roht - contractures

Do you see anything the same about these words in Hebrew and English? It's a hell of a lot harder trying to read English in Hebrew than it is trying to read Hebrew in Hebrew (on the plus side, I'm learning to type in Hebrew). And that my friends throws your brain off, much like trying to understand that the songs you learned in Hebrew are American songs, and makes your brain hurt.

And the step after Approval is...go back and re-submit stuff!

The pictures I gave in were blurry...well...I'm sorry...I didn't think they were...

So now I have to go get them redone. Rite-Aid printed one of them with a bright spot on my eyebrow, so I have to get them redone. Man!

I feel like I should be typing this blog in Hebrew, because it's out on the Internet and very, very public...which means anyone, including my coworkers and supervisor(s?-- כן, כולל ה---בלייפפפפפפ(how do you bleep something out in Hebrew?)), can read it.

I sort of worry about that-- as in someone's going to go, "So I heard you have a blog and I checked it out...aliyah (pronounced like the dead singer)? What is that?" And I'm going to go, "Shit." Like happened today, sort of. My on-site supervisor wanted to speak to me and I thought, "Shit, someone said something to her about me moving to Israel." No, she wanted to speak to me about something else.

But really, how do you explain aliyah to people who have never even heard of it? Everything I think of just sounds so...it falls short.

Next step-- approval!

You thought I was going to say I got approved for aliyah...no, not quite.
I did, however, get my documents checked by Shai (the Jewish Agency shaliach), gave in my financial affidavit and passport pictures (printed earlier today) to NBN-- see this entry for a bit on that; I decided to practice being Israeli and ignore what they said. Worked out nicely-- now let's see if they don't lose the documents...
I should hear back about approval and Etzion after the summer, but Shai doesn't think there will be a problem (Hi, Murphy, because I said something. I should go back and erase that and bite my tongue. But I'm not-- which may come back to bite me in the tooseek (thank you Benji Lovitt of "What War Zone"-- see my oleh blog links-- for the spelling. Not that he knows who I am, but I found his blog and think that spelling is great. Benji, if you would like to link to my blog, feel free))...but-- back to the mother of all Israeli phrases-- "יהיה בסדר"-- "y'hiyeh b'seder-- "it'll be ok/fine." (I'm just full of cliches tonight, aren't I? And parentheses.)

But back to the meeting. I met with Robin Berman, who works in the employment dept. of NBN. Really, I don't think I need to have any more "pre-aliyah meetings" unless it's for a very specific purpose, like this was. This one was to get my documents checked. I don't need employment meetings, unless it deals with OT specifically. I don't need "community meetings" because I know where I'm going to start out and have some ideas-- and I'll go away for Shabbatot, so I'll see what communities I like. I know that the large populations of singles are in Jerusalem (Anglos in Katamon, Rechavia, German Colony, etc.) and around Bar Ilan (Givat Shmuel-ish area). I know that I want to live up North eventually, but there aren't really singles up there. Which limits my dating pool...If there's the word "informational" in the meeting-- odds are I don't need it. I have the information, I know where to find the stuff I don't have, and I know how to use my email to email people questions. I'm really good at that.

If I haven't heard back by September, I'll email NBN and Shai. Because really, that's only 4 months. I mean, it's Israel and I could do this 4 weeks before and no one would say boo-- Shai goes, "This is for the summer?" ...which is in about 6 weeks...it was funny when Robin went upstairs to get Shai. I had my meeting with Robin-- she gave me a few tips about employment and then went to check about my affidavit and if someone could come look at my documents. So Shai comes in and goes, "Hey! How are you?" Robin goes, "You know each other?" It was a "you-had-to-be there" moment, I think.

Here goes nothing

Meetings with NBN and a shaliach tomorrow...wish me luck.
I have 5 copies of everything, except passport photos...those I have to print.

I went to RiteAid today to get them done. They print. There's a bright orange spot on one of my eyebrows...I didn't have time to wait for them to redo them, so I'm going to have to get them redone on Sunday, I'll find another RiteAid in the city. But in the meantime, NBN still wants 3 passport photos. So I'm going to print up a page-- well, 2 pages. Passport photos are standardly 2"x2". NBN's site says 35 mm wide x 45 mm high with the face being 25 mm wide and 35 mm high. So I have 3 photo pages to make:
-one with 2x2 photos
-one with the picture 35 mm wide x 45 mm high without the face being 25 mm wide and 35 mm high
-one with the picture 35 mm wide x 45 mm high without the face being 25 mm wide and 35 mm high


I think I get 16 photos on a page...makes 48 photos. Problem with printing one whole page at a time is cutting it. Ew. And, NONE OF THE PRINTERS THAT I TRIED WORK! AND I TRIED THREE OF THEM! THREE! THREE! (and once more for good luck-- three!)

Here's hoping I can print them tomorrow in school. If not, I is screwed. And that is bad.

!במירון רבי שמעון, אדוננו בר יוחאי

Lag BaOmer! Yay!
In Israel it means medurot (bonfires) and the whole freaking country smelling like smoke. But it's fun. מדורות (bonfires), על האש (BBQs), chilling. It looks like the whole country is going up in flames, there are so many fires. I spent last Lag BaOmer at the Kaufmans; they organized a מנגל and everyone brought food (there was far too much), we played Banagrams, Elinor and Yehuda played the cello, Arie made THE tea, and we roasted marshmallows. And there were bonfires ALL OVER.


English-date wise, it was my birthday! Well, now it's still May 11 in the States, but in Israel it's already May 12. Eden and I slept over by Hannah's the night before, we broke out the cookies early, I opened on of my cards, had an interesting texting conversation with Shloime because I couldn't sleep, and then the next morning Hannah, Eden, and I went to Bayit Vagan for shlav bet. More about that tomorrow.

"Just one step...one small step"

All right, so maybe that song has absolutely nothing to do with anything, but the words, out of the song's context, fit nicely. In the song's context? Not at all...it seems to be about suicide.

But really, the song has nothing to do with this post. The point of this post is that I'm taking the next step in my aliyah-- having my interviews and getting all my papers looked at and whatnot. I have those meetings on Wednesday. It's going to be NBN and the Sochnut together.

Perle told me to make sure that my Jewish letter gets signed or certified or something because Misrad Hapnim didn't believe that there was a Beit Din of France...seriously. SERIOUSLY?! Seriously. Really. Not joking. Not telling an untruth. A falsehood. Etc. I'm overtired.

That is this week's aliyah bit. I'll let you know how it goes once it's gone.

shwaya, shwaya...

הגשתי את (כמעט) הכל...חסר לי התמונות דרכון ואת הטופס הכספי האורגינלי (שלחתי צילום)-- קבלו את המכתב מהבן-דוד שלי שאני יהודיה... יש לי פגישה ב13 במאי עם נציגים מנפש בנפש והסוכנות-- אבל אני לא יודעת מה קורה עם הפרוצס-- מתי אני אדע אם התקבלתי או אם אני מקבלת קיצבה מנב"נ...

אבל טוב-- אני יכלה להגיד, בכל האמת, שאני עדיין לא התקבלתי לעליה או לאולפן ואין לי תאריך לטיסה. יש לי חודש לעליה-- אבל לא תאריך.

Meh

.Can't hand-deliver the affidavit and the photos because NBN NY "does not have reception for the public"-- I just want to drop off an envelope, I'm not planning on sitting down and having a cup of coffee...and apparently can't bring them to my meeting?
I just think it's ridiculous to have to MAIL something that I can easily drop off-- it's not like the office is that big...Mailing with tracking...gotcha...
I really just want to send in my proof if Judaism letter and then I can get things moving. It's a good thing I'm not going in the summer in the end, because at this rate I won't be approved.
That being said, I realize that I'll have no clue when I'm going until at least October-- and probably at least until after the chagim...so I can make all the plans I want, I'm not actually going to know when the NBN flights are until...who knows when? Good and bad.
On the upside, I can honestly say that I really don'y know when I'm going...not have I gotten accepted yet...nor do I know if I'll get into Etzion...so...uh...really, I know I'm making aliyah. Fantastic.

Yom HaZikaron and Yom HaAtzmaut

Yom HaZikaron has so much more meaning in Israel than Memorial Day seems to have here. I'm sure it has more meaning for people who know military servicemen and women who were killed, but it's also very different. It's a day to mourn the people who were killed, not just for sales and being off of work. Memorial Day here means a long weekend and going away with family and bbqs and for some people, a time to remember and mourn people who were killed...Memorial Day in Israel means a day to remember people who were killed. There is a siren when traffic stops and people get out of their cars IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY to stand out of respect. It's a day where there are ceremonies all over the country in the 24 military cemeteries (24! Military alone! In a country the size of New Jersey!), not to mention those that are buried not in military cemeteries.

Everyone knows someone or has some connection to someone...even me. The farthest connection I can think of is 1 degree away...somebody whose best friend/friend/sibling/uncle/aunt/parent/grandparent/combination of the above/other was killed. I can't think of any farther connections.

Maybe that's why it's so meaningful. It's very, very real. And when it comes into your life, it becomes much more real. On the other hand, I have the same connection to people who were killed here...1 degree away. But it doesn't feel the same. Maybe because it's so many more people? Or just the attitude. Memorial Day is a day to remember and memorialize-- not "sales and bbq day" (which happens to be the day

It's in!

My Proof of Judaism letter is in! All the paperwork is in (minus the original financial affidavit and the passport photos, which I am not sending in; I will bring them in by hand).
It feels like everything is in, but not completed. I still have to have interviews with NBN and the Sochnut (Jewish Agency). I emailed one of the shlichim here to find out about applying to Ulpan Etzion, and he said that first I have to have an interview with the Sochnut...but NBN is kind of running North American aliyah, it seems. So I set up a meeting for May, and we'll take it from there.
On the upside, I can honestly say that I haven't even been accepted for aliyah yet, much less Uplan Etzion...מעונינת לדעת מה ממנהלת וסגן מנהלת יחשבו על זה...אולי לא אגיד להם עד שבוע לפני העליה-- או היום לפני חופש לחורף-- "ביי, אני לא חוזרת אחרי החופש!" סתם-- אני אגיד להם חודש לפני, אבל רק שאני עושה "תכנית עברית אינטסיבי"-- ושאני אחזור בקיץ (אבל לא שאני חוזרת רק לקיץ...) נראה
We shall see how things go and where they go.


On another note, there was an NY --> Israel group meeting yesterday. Went well, I think. I met the organizer of the TA group (she was doing TA, late 20's-40's; I was doign Jlem, 20's...we've merged) who is just as into organization as I am! Yay!
Oh, and I was at Allison's for Shabbat. It was an Israeli Shabbat at NYU. Twas fun.

Changes in the air

or at least on my blog. I changed the title-- figured "יהיה בסדר" is more of an appropriate title, since that seems to be the phrase du jour (or years) of Israel. And I also changed the subtitle to "in the middle" because I'm not at the beginning anymore. Which is kind of good and scary at the same time.
Good, because it means that I'm not at the beginning any more-- I'm going somewhere, making progress. It also means that my aliyah is getting closer. I'm trying to sort things. I know I'm going to have to come back in June for Carly's wedding, so that's when I'm going to send my lift/stuff. Which leads me to the next point: Ship vs. Buy There?
I wrote a note on Facebook and also sent an email to the NBN Singles list-- if anybody reading this (does anybody read this?) has any input, I'd appreciate it:

I'm trying to figure out if it's worth it to buy things like dishes and pots in the States and ship them vs. buying them in Israel. I have to send stuff for sure-- I don't think I'll need a full lift-- but I have to somehow get my clothes, textbooks, and personal items to Israel and they can't levitate themselves...
I already have a lot of kitchen things from college and other people, but not a set of dishes, silverware, and good cookware. I don't know how much companies like Corelle, Farberware, T-Fal, Tramontina, etc. are in Israel and I know they're not expensive/priced very, very well here...
If anyone has any input on this, I would definitely appreciate it.


Back to the middle...it's happening. I don't want to leave in the middle of the year, but I can't keep pushing it off...it's really hard having to have pushed it off this time. Unless I have a really good reason to stay here, I'm going then...Assuming I go-- let's say I go Jan. 4. That's just over 8 months away. That means I have 8 months more with my family the way it is now-- close, calling all the time, going over when I want. It's just-- I want this and it's scary at the same time. I wish I had a crystal ball and could see how things would be 9 months down the road, 10 months-- just to know that I do it and am able to hack it. It's going to suck-- I say it every time. It's going to suck, and Mommy, Daddy, and my sisters won't be there for me to call locally...they'll still be a phone call away, but it will be a 7-hour time difference phone call away.

It's 8 months away and I'm already dreading it. But I know that Israel is right for me.

I said something about an aliyah thing I did, and one of the teachers at my school said, "Wow, you're really serious about this." And I said, "Yeah. I am." The concept of another country, one you weren't born in and your parents aren't from and your grandparents aren't from-- somewhere you never went until you were already a young adult-- being home is something that most people don't get.

more on this later when it's not dinnertime.

Oh! One more thing!

I found another oleh's blog-- Gefilte Fish Out of Water-- http://gfishoutofwater.wordpress.com/ -- (which, if he has Google Alerts, will show up that I linked to his blog). I started reading the beginning entries, which are helpful because now I know that I will be screwed over by beaurocracy. If I wasn't sure until now...anywho, really going to have dinner now and will continue reading said blog later.

More aliyah paperwork

Got an email today from Nefesh B'Nefesh about Summer 2009 flight dates...bummed me out...but whatever, it's better that I stay here the extra six months...I just keep telling myself that, even though it doesn't really make me feel much better.

Emailed in more paperwork-- updated passport stamps from my pilot trip, updated (from my pilot trip) entrance-exit form, Proof of Living Overseas in the form of a report card and honor roll letter (not bragging, just couldn't find my senior year report card so I used that. Hope they accept it!), the financial affidavit that Zvi signed as the accountant, and what else? I think that's it...yeah, 5 things...

I'm waiting for the Proof of Judaism letter from my cousin, and I also have to send in 3 hard copy passport photos. But I might just bring them to the office directly because I don't really trust the mail...

On another Israel-related note, someone asked me about teaching CPR and First Aid. Definitely will have to do chovshim/nahagim (Israeli medic course) when I'm there...once I, you know, speak the language enough...I also have to study the chovshim/nahagim material that I have from Sharon. That should help too.

And also, I'm taking an NDT (movement theory) course and one of the OTs instructing it also teaches in Israel! And she's going to put me in touch with some OTs there! Yay for connections!

All right, dinner time. And mom mentioned something about a pita in the freezer. Chumus, here I come!

Medical Updates

So...uh...meeting with the Health Ministry deputy director-general Chezi Levi did not go as well as I had hoped.

I had hoped to get more information about the exam and the law, but I didn't get much. I did, however, get the email address of the OT person in Misrad Habriut (Health Ministry). I also found out that the exam will be "American questions"-- aka, multiple choice. And that the Ministry doesn't know too much about the exam, and won't have one ready for the summer. Oh, and also, that I can't take the exam if I'm not a citizen. Meh.

So...right, this is just going to take time...it's a good thing I'm working for a year-- that way there won't be a question of having done staj (internship) or not. But I'm going to get a letter anyway.


To register for the exam I will need:

2 passport pictures.
A copy of your Teudat Zehut, including the appendix with your address (“sefakh”).
Final diploma or a certificate from the university indicating completion of studies, fulfillment of all of the university’s requirements and eligibility for a diploma in the relevant field, which will be granted at a specified date.
Official certification indicating the start and end date of studies.
Official certification of completion of an internship (“stage”) or, alternatively, for people who studied abroad, official certification about work done in the field abroad, with a valid license, for at least one year.
Official certifications of work experience, from the relevant medical institutions, indicating the start and end date of work in each institution.
Valid license.
A letter of good standing from the relevant authorities in the country that you made Aliyah from, proving that you never received complaints about discipline, negligence or professional ethics.
An application requesting to be tested in the relevant field. The forms are available online at: http://www.health.gov.il/pages/default.asp?maincat=4&catid=42&pageid=3784

And if the documents are in a language other than Hebrew or Arabic, they must be translated and notarized (which, by the way, is a lot of money. because I did some-- the ones I have). So far I have (translated and notarized):
Final diploma (BS and MS)
Valid license

Yeah, not much...

I still need:
2 passport pictures.
A copy of your Teudat Zehut, including the appendix with your address (“sefakh”).
Official certification indicating the start and end date of studies.
Official certification of completion of an internship (“stage”) or, alternatively, for people who studied abroad, official certification about work done in the field abroad, with a valid license, for at least one year.
Official certifications of work experience, from the relevant medical institutions, indicating the start and end date of work in each institution.
A letter of good standing from the relevant authorities in the country that you made Aliyah from, proving that you never received complaints about discipline, negligence or professional ethics.
An application requesting to be tested in the relevant field. The forms are available online at: http://www.health.gov.il/pages/default.asp?maincat=4&catid=42&pageid=3784


The passport pictures aren't a big deal, I just have to get them done (and shoudl go to Israel with a small stack of them-- like 20 or so). I can't get the teudat zehut (ID card) until...well, I get citizenship. I have to get a letter from my school stating the start and end dates of studies. I have to get letters from the DOE and OTANY (I really hope I get to work there again, it's a great place). And I'm going to send a request for the letter of good standing to the Licensing Board in NY and the NBCOT (the national board that certified OTs and OTAs) probably in September. The application I just print out and fill in/out.


Shwaya, shwaya...

Northern Life updates

Had a meeting with the Go North representative yesterday.
She suggested that I don't do the Go North initiative, because I'm not settled, and if I take the grant, I'm obligated to live in the North for 3 years-- and I might be able to apply for the grant later on, after I'm already in Israel.


Medical meetings to follow.

Updates on the exam

Got an email back from an OT who just had a meeting with the OT rep from Misrad Habriut. The results:

-Exam will be given twice a year, once in the summer and once in the winter) probably July and January).
-Everyone who does not have an Israeli license (anyone who graduated within the past 5 years or just never got a license) will have to take an exam, even if they have worked for the five years.
-No reciprocity with other countries exams.
-Exam will be given only in Hebrew.


I know I'm making the right decision, postponing my aliyah for 6 months...but I still don't like it. At least I have the disc from Gila to study. It's a lot of terms I don't know...I hope they come out with some prep material soon.

Serious emotional aliyah issues

Not the "I'm going to miss my family," which I will, but the "I can't deal with being here another 11 months, not when I got so excited about moving this July."

I really...I just...don't want to be here. Not that I don't want to be here, I want to be there.

And it's really frustrating that there's no information about the licensing law other than, "there will be an exam, most likely in Hebrew."

I wonder if I could go in, like November or December. Student Week is too early-- I really want to go on a NBN flight, which happen mostly in the summer. I can go on any flight, but I'd rather go on a flight with lots of olim-- or at least other olim...and I can't start a new school in the fall and then leave 4 months later...but I really don't like some people at my school who I have to deal with.

Is it running away?

It's official...

I called NBN and changed my aliyah date to Jan. 2010.

It's really depressing, I feel like I'm going to cry, or at least I want to cry. I want to be there so badly...I know, focus on being here and not not being there because then I'll just be upset.
But I got really excited about being able to move there this summer and start my life and now it feels like my life is on hold in a way.
I know it'll be better in the long run, but that doesn't make the current term any better. I know everything happens for a reason and all works out for the best, but I'd like to be able to see into the future and see just how this works out.

I'm probably going to be somewhat depressed for the next few days/week-ish.