Since I was little, summer was filled with humidity and thunderstorms providing relief from said humidity.
I love storms and always have-- the smell before and after, watching the dark gray stormclouds come in and slowly shift across the sky with a clear line between the storm and the non-storm sky, the change to shades of green or orange depending on the storm, the sound of the drops and the rush of water as the sky opens up, the sound of the thunder and the deep vibrations throughout my body, the actual cracks and bolts of lightening across the sky and the way some lightening actually lights up the entire sky. And, of course, going outside when it's only raining and no longer thundering and lightening-ing.
Last night there was a beautiful storm. I was walking back to my house when the thunder started, and then the lightening. As I was walking home I must have seen about 4 or 5 clear cracks of lightening, with one lighting up the entire sky. Ma rabu ma'asecha Hashem [How numerous are your works, G-d].
I am always in awe when it thunderstorms.
Downside to living in Israel: Not enough thunderstorms. Or snow.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Clarification Re: my previous post
The challenge is to come up with possible solutions to "PB [peanut butter] goes with..."
The things to match the PB with are:
a. J [jelly]
b. chocolate
c. banana (honey and bacon optional)
d. fluff
The example that I gave previously, say it was choice e., was "celery and raisins." I am looking for what the combination of PB, celery, and raisins would be called. Answer: Ants on a log.
Another example:
Pretzels. Answer: Peanut-butter coated pretzels. Another answer: Dipping pretzels in peanut butter.
Not looking for super-deep answers here. Go!
The things to match the PB with are:
a. J [jelly]
b. chocolate
c. banana (honey and bacon optional)
d. fluff
The example that I gave previously, say it was choice e., was "celery and raisins." I am looking for what the combination of PB, celery, and raisins would be called. Answer: Ants on a log.
Another example:
Pretzels. Answer: Peanut-butter coated pretzels. Another answer: Dipping pretzels in peanut butter.
Not looking for super-deep answers here. Go!
Friday, July 22, 2011
PB goes with...
a. J
b. chocolate
c. banana (honey and bacon optional)
d. fluff
A batch of cookies of your choice to the person who comes up with the most combinations that mean something in classic American culture the quickest (in lieu of the batch of cookies, you may choose a cake or other baked food such as bread. Oh, and we have to be in the same country so I can get you the cookies). I will give an example:
"PB goes with..." if the choice was "celery and raisins," a correct answer would be, "ants on a log." There may be more than one answer-- goal: the most and culturally correct answers.
I've been baking again. I've missed it. I am a very spoiled child when it comes to kitchen and cooking/baking/decorating equipment. My mother bakes a lot, and so has lots of stuff-- pretty much everything you could need to bake and decorate-- different trays, molds, utensils, scoops, etc. It's wonderful. I've gotten used to baking with less than my mother's full kitchen, as well as doing almost everything by hand (definitely all the mixing), so when she offered me her mixer, I declined. I've gotten used to mixing things by hand. I just hate the dishes.
I have very quickly gotten used to large quantities-- a 1 lb. (approx. 450 grams) block of margarine. A 1-gallon (approx. 3.78 liters) jug of oil. 5-lb. (approx. 2.2 kilos) bags of flour. A 5 lb. (again, approx. 2.2 kilos) bottle of honey. And it's not like these are in restaurant supply places; many of these things can be found in the regular supermarket (actually, I think everything except the honey). I will miss these things. Oh, well.
In addition to the cookies, I also made challah today and the dough came out AMAZING. I let it rise in the spare bedroom because it was warm in there and it rose beautifully! It was one of the best doughs I think I've ever worked with; it could also be the extra kneading-- I kneaded it a bit more than usual. The flour also felt...lighter somehow. Maybe finer. Either way, the challahs came out beautiful.
Also, Fairway has za'atar. Except their za'atar doesn't actually include any hyssop (the literal translation of za'atar is hyssop), and includes oregano. First time I've seen za'atar like this. I used it anyway.
b. chocolate
c. banana (honey and bacon optional)
d. fluff
A batch of cookies of your choice to the person who comes up with the most combinations that mean something in classic American culture the quickest (in lieu of the batch of cookies, you may choose a cake or other baked food such as bread. Oh, and we have to be in the same country so I can get you the cookies). I will give an example:
"PB goes with..." if the choice was "celery and raisins," a correct answer would be, "ants on a log." There may be more than one answer-- goal: the most and culturally correct answers.
I've been baking again. I've missed it. I am a very spoiled child when it comes to kitchen and cooking/baking/decorating equipment. My mother bakes a lot, and so has lots of stuff-- pretty much everything you could need to bake and decorate-- different trays, molds, utensils, scoops, etc. It's wonderful. I've gotten used to baking with less than my mother's full kitchen, as well as doing almost everything by hand (definitely all the mixing), so when she offered me her mixer, I declined. I've gotten used to mixing things by hand. I just hate the dishes.
I have very quickly gotten used to large quantities-- a 1 lb. (approx. 450 grams) block of margarine. A 1-gallon (approx. 3.78 liters) jug of oil. 5-lb. (approx. 2.2 kilos) bags of flour. A 5 lb. (again, approx. 2.2 kilos) bottle of honey. And it's not like these are in restaurant supply places; many of these things can be found in the regular supermarket (actually, I think everything except the honey). I will miss these things. Oh, well.
In addition to the cookies, I also made challah today and the dough came out AMAZING. I let it rise in the spare bedroom because it was warm in there and it rose beautifully! It was one of the best doughs I think I've ever worked with; it could also be the extra kneading-- I kneaded it a bit more than usual. The flour also felt...lighter somehow. Maybe finer. Either way, the challahs came out beautiful.
Also, Fairway has za'atar. Except their za'atar doesn't actually include any hyssop (the literal translation of za'atar is hyssop), and includes oregano. First time I've seen za'atar like this. I used it anyway.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
My country is on fire, and not just because it's ridiculously hot out
Or, How Lauren Admitted She's Become Kinda Racist...
Over the past week there have been fires "breaking out" all over. Quite a few in the Jerusalem area, however there was one today in the center of the country. Question marks if they are arson, partly due to the fact that there were multiple fires that started at approximately the same time. Oh, and earlier also, one in the Golan (but that was apparently set by careless hikers (?), so we'll put that in a separate category). I read about the various fires and I asked a friend in the 911 system there (ok, it's not 911, but I mean the emergency services-- police, fire, ems) if the fires were set by Arabs.
Seriously, when did I become such a racist? Ok, fine, it's when I started admitting out loud that, especially in my area, there are many Arabs who want to kill me. Not all of them, but many. On the other hand, I work with many, many Arabs who are really nice. I mean, I never asked them if they want to kill me, but...I don't think they do...
It's not so okay to be racist in America. But people are, and that's life.
I have this conflict, because on one hand-- I shouldn't be racist and should not jump to "Arabs?" Because there are many fine Arabs-- I work with many. But...I guess...it's kind of become a little...reflexive, if you will. A little more alert, a little more aware, of who is around me. Picking up on the subtle accent on certain letters. But I still will get up for an elderly Arab on the bus, because he/she is an elderly person and that's right. I treat Arab kids the same as the Jewish ones. I mentioned this to another friend and he said that I'm Israeli-- nothing you can do about it. But that still leaves this conflict unresolved.
Signing off with "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist" from Avenue Q.
Over the past week there have been fires "breaking out" all over. Quite a few in the Jerusalem area, however there was one today in the center of the country. Question marks if they are arson, partly due to the fact that there were multiple fires that started at approximately the same time. Oh, and earlier also, one in the Golan (but that was apparently set by careless hikers (?), so we'll put that in a separate category). I read about the various fires and I asked a friend in the 911 system there (ok, it's not 911, but I mean the emergency services-- police, fire, ems) if the fires were set by Arabs.
Seriously, when did I become such a racist? Ok, fine, it's when I started admitting out loud that, especially in my area, there are many Arabs who want to kill me. Not all of them, but many. On the other hand, I work with many, many Arabs who are really nice. I mean, I never asked them if they want to kill me, but...I don't think they do...
It's not so okay to be racist in America. But people are, and that's life.
I have this conflict, because on one hand-- I shouldn't be racist and should not jump to "Arabs?" Because there are many fine Arabs-- I work with many. But...I guess...it's kind of become a little...reflexive, if you will. A little more alert, a little more aware, of who is around me. Picking up on the subtle accent on certain letters. But I still will get up for an elderly Arab on the bus, because he/she is an elderly person and that's right. I treat Arab kids the same as the Jewish ones. I mentioned this to another friend and he said that I'm Israeli-- nothing you can do about it. But that still leaves this conflict unresolved.
Signing off with "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist" from Avenue Q.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Aha, the NYCDOE
Note: This post is kind of disjointed.
Back working in the DOE as a contractor. Someone asked me if I preferred being a DOE therapist or a contract therapist, and I said "DOE." Definitely prefer being DOE-- much easier and much more flexible. So what if I can't take RSA kids at a clinic? Or work at Macy's? I have so many more options that I don't need to.
Being a contractor is a pain, because you're second. Caseloads go to DOE therapists first and you get whoever is left. You only get paid if you see the kid-- if the kid isn't there, you don't see them = you don't get paid for that session, despite you being there. The awesome courses that the DOE gives-- you don't get. Also, you don't have paperwork time, which also sucks. There are upsides, too-- I can leave once I've seen all my kids for the day; if I have 10 sessions, I can leave when all of those kids have been seen, regardless of the hour. But I prefer being DOE, but the DOE doesn't hire summer employees. So I am doing contract. In the end I didn't get the kids I wanted (because a DOE therapist picked them up-- but hey-- they're getting seen, which is more than they were for the past couple of years!), but I'm at the school I was at two summers ago, and splitting sites, which is fine-- 2 days one school, 3 days another. Maybe I'll have some of my kids from two years ago.
I like the lists-- who is mandated for what therapy and how much; much more organized than "Ok, here is your class, go decide who needs OT and how much who is getting. Oh, and you only have a few hours for all these kids, and if you don't treat them they don't get OT." At least this way the kids who don't get seen in school have the option to go elsewhere and it's covered. There also aren't whole class sessions, which is a nice change.
Back working in the DOE as a contractor. Someone asked me if I preferred being a DOE therapist or a contract therapist, and I said "DOE." Definitely prefer being DOE-- much easier and much more flexible. So what if I can't take RSA kids at a clinic? Or work at Macy's? I have so many more options that I don't need to.
Being a contractor is a pain, because you're second. Caseloads go to DOE therapists first and you get whoever is left. You only get paid if you see the kid-- if the kid isn't there, you don't see them = you don't get paid for that session, despite you being there. The awesome courses that the DOE gives-- you don't get. Also, you don't have paperwork time, which also sucks. There are upsides, too-- I can leave once I've seen all my kids for the day; if I have 10 sessions, I can leave when all of those kids have been seen, regardless of the hour. But I prefer being DOE, but the DOE doesn't hire summer employees. So I am doing contract. In the end I didn't get the kids I wanted (because a DOE therapist picked them up-- but hey-- they're getting seen, which is more than they were for the past couple of years!), but I'm at the school I was at two summers ago, and splitting sites, which is fine-- 2 days one school, 3 days another. Maybe I'll have some of my kids from two years ago.
I like the lists-- who is mandated for what therapy and how much; much more organized than "Ok, here is your class, go decide who needs OT and how much who is getting. Oh, and you only have a few hours for all these kids, and if you don't treat them they don't get OT." At least this way the kids who don't get seen in school have the option to go elsewhere and it's covered. There also aren't whole class sessions, which is a nice change.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Grenade Cake, II
For A Labyrinth, A Soldier's Mother, freevees/aka FishInTheJello and anyone else who can appreciate a cake that looks like it could involve an explosive device:
That would be the grenade cake. And in case you're wondering-- no, the words and flowers don't taste good. They were not nearly as flavorful or as tasty as one might hope, since they have bright colors. They were taste-tested before placing them on the cake, and the conclusion was that the cake's flavor would compensate for the lack of flavor on the words and flowers part. On the upside, they weren't bad. Just not good-tasting...kind of-- eh. Next time use frosting or real sugar letters.
That would be the grenade cake. And in case you're wondering-- no, the words and flowers don't taste good. They were not nearly as flavorful or as tasty as one might hope, since they have bright colors. They were taste-tested before placing them on the cake, and the conclusion was that the cake's flavor would compensate for the lack of flavor on the words and flowers part. On the upside, they weren't bad. Just not good-tasting...kind of-- eh. Next time use frosting or real sugar letters.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Chinese Fortune Cookie Fortune
"You don't need strength to let go of something. What you really need is understanding." --Guy Finley, via a fortune cookie
Agree-- but disagree. You need understanding to be able to realize that you need to let go, but you also need the strength to act on it. You can understand all you want, but until you have the strength to let go you're just going to understand. And until you understand that you have to let go-- that what you're holding on to isn't helping you or is somehow hurting you-- you can be as strong as you want, and you're still going to be fighting the letting go, because you don't know why you have to let go.
Discuss.
Agree-- but disagree. You need understanding to be able to realize that you need to let go, but you also need the strength to act on it. You can understand all you want, but until you have the strength to let go you're just going to understand. And until you understand that you have to let go-- that what you're holding on to isn't helping you or is somehow hurting you-- you can be as strong as you want, and you're still going to be fighting the letting go, because you don't know why you have to let go.
Discuss.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Related Health Professions (aka OT, PT, Speech, Dieticians) law changes (again)
Or, Timing Is Everything
I have been amazingly blessed in terms of timing and my aliyah. Here is a timeline, starting from HS graduation (it really starts from there, because that's when I went on Birthright and ended up in MDA...just...read)
June 2003: HS graduation, leave on Birthright the next day. Decide on the return flight to America that the plane can leave, but I was staying. Plane did not leave my seat on the tarmac. Oh, well.
September 2003: Start getting involved in Birthright alumni stuff in NY, including the Book Club (since defunct). At some point between here and Fall 2005, meet Michah Aron (Cohler), and he sends me a copy of a film he made, "Someday Soldiers," about a man named Yochai Porat who was killed during his work as a medic in the IDF (remember this; it comes into play later).
Summer 2004: Work on Christ in the City (director: Yitz Brilliant) and meet Ben, who left to do JIF (Jewish Impact Films) in LA (did not know that he was leaving to do JIF, just that he left after the first round of filming
December 2005: Participate in JIF (Jewish Impact Films), a 10-day film program in Israel. Before we left, one of the staff members said something to the effect of, "So you're planning on moving here?" to me. I told him no; maybe I could come for a couple of years, but I couldn't leave my family.
Fall 2007: Decide that after I finish OT school I want to go to Israel for a couple of months, because I hadn't been there more than 10 days at a shot. I decide to go to a seminary for a few weeks and then do something else boil it down to Sar-El Volunteer program and the Yochai Porat* Magen David Adom Overseas volunteer program. Talk to people, decide on MDA.
December 2007: Interview for MDA, get accepted. Learn how the Israeli system works: if you don't ask for it enough/make enough noise, nothing happens. The more you push, the faster things move.
February 2008-March 2008: Start the 10-day training course and volunteer with MDA. Make lots of friends and start to acclimate to the Israeli culture .And think about making aliyah. Don't want to leave, but decide to come back for the 88-hour/Natan courses and madrichim.
May-June 2008: Come back. Do the courses, volunteer, teach. Decide I'm making aliyah.
September 2008: Work in the DOE, plan to make aliyah in July 2009. Lots and lots of research, start making contacts in the OT world in Israel.
January 2009: Pilot trip; meet lots of OTs and talk to NBN.
Spring 2009: Realize that I will not have saved enough to make aliyah in July, and push it off until December.
Summer 2009: Start dealing with license stuff; find out that I have to have a teudat zehut in order to get a license...
December 30, 2009: Aliyah with NBN.
January 2010: Start dealing with OT stuff in Israel.
August 2010: Think I have all my paperwork in, and then find out that, no, they need a letter re: my fieldwork hours. But nobody would tell me this unless I asked...Israel...
October 2010: Get my temporary OT license without having to take the exam-- yes!
July 2010: Find out that as of the latest law change, all OT/PT/Speech have to take a licensing exam.
Now, let's explain how this, timing-wise:
If I hadn't gone on Birthright in June 2003, I would not have gotten involved with the BRI Alumni Organization (the pre-Birthright Next group), and would not have met Michah and would not have heard about MDA Overseas.
If I had not heard about MDA Overseas, or if I had just found it without being able to talk to past participants, I would not have volunteered there.
If I had not volunteered there, I would not have had the group of people that I had to rely on when I made aliyah (and still have).
OT-wise: If I had gone to seminary or done something where I was one year behind in terms of finishing OT school, I would have had to take the exam. In Hebrew.
If I had made aliyah straight after finishing OT school in NY, I wouldn't have had my NYS license and would not have been eligible to get "grandfathered" in for my Israeli license.
If I hadn't made aliyah when I did, I would not have been able to get an Israeli license and would not have been able to not take the exam.
It's so amazing to me that I see so much of how I thought things were bad and they really turned out to be right.
For example: I wasn't able to graduate until June 2008 because there was a mix-up with my credits and I never got credit for courses I was exempted from. If that hadn't happened, I would have graduated on time, taken my exam earlier, and would have started working after Pesach, which would have meant that I couldn't be in Israel for the 88-hour and madrichim, and I would not have built up that network and made the connections that I did to enable me to make aliyah.
If I hadn't pushed my aliyah off to December 2009, I would not have had my roommates from ulpan (who are amazing), and I would not be living in the apartment that I am in, in the location that it is.
If I hadn't been in that course/cycle of ulpan, I would not have met the person who gave me the name and number of somebody at Misrad Habriut to sort all my paperwork out.
If I hadn't made aliyah when I did, I would have had to take the exam. And I would have taken it early, which means it would have been in Hebrew.
Thank you, G-d, for everything!
*In case you haven't made the connection yet, the MDA Overseas program is named for Yochai. He was the person who started the whole thing, and after he was killed the program was named in his honor and memory.
I have been amazingly blessed in terms of timing and my aliyah. Here is a timeline, starting from HS graduation (it really starts from there, because that's when I went on Birthright and ended up in MDA...just...read)
June 2003: HS graduation, leave on Birthright the next day. Decide on the return flight to America that the plane can leave, but I was staying. Plane did not leave my seat on the tarmac. Oh, well.
September 2003: Start getting involved in Birthright alumni stuff in NY, including the Book Club (since defunct). At some point between here and Fall 2005, meet Michah Aron (Cohler), and he sends me a copy of a film he made, "Someday Soldiers," about a man named Yochai Porat who was killed during his work as a medic in the IDF (remember this; it comes into play later).
Summer 2004: Work on Christ in the City (director: Yitz Brilliant) and meet Ben, who left to do JIF (Jewish Impact Films) in LA (did not know that he was leaving to do JIF, just that he left after the first round of filming
December 2005: Participate in JIF (Jewish Impact Films), a 10-day film program in Israel. Before we left, one of the staff members said something to the effect of, "So you're planning on moving here?" to me. I told him no; maybe I could come for a couple of years, but I couldn't leave my family.
Fall 2007: Decide that after I finish OT school I want to go to Israel for a couple of months, because I hadn't been there more than 10 days at a shot. I decide to go to a seminary for a few weeks and then do something else boil it down to Sar-El Volunteer program and the Yochai Porat* Magen David Adom Overseas volunteer program. Talk to people, decide on MDA.
December 2007: Interview for MDA, get accepted. Learn how the Israeli system works: if you don't ask for it enough/make enough noise, nothing happens. The more you push, the faster things move.
February 2008-March 2008: Start the 10-day training course and volunteer with MDA. Make lots of friends and start to acclimate to the Israeli culture .And think about making aliyah. Don't want to leave, but decide to come back for the 88-hour/Natan courses and madrichim.
May-June 2008: Come back. Do the courses, volunteer, teach. Decide I'm making aliyah.
September 2008: Work in the DOE, plan to make aliyah in July 2009. Lots and lots of research, start making contacts in the OT world in Israel.
January 2009: Pilot trip; meet lots of OTs and talk to NBN.
Spring 2009: Realize that I will not have saved enough to make aliyah in July, and push it off until December.
Summer 2009: Start dealing with license stuff; find out that I have to have a teudat zehut in order to get a license...
December 30, 2009: Aliyah with NBN.
January 2010: Start dealing with OT stuff in Israel.
August 2010: Think I have all my paperwork in, and then find out that, no, they need a letter re: my fieldwork hours. But nobody would tell me this unless I asked...Israel...
October 2010: Get my temporary OT license without having to take the exam-- yes!
July 2010: Find out that as of the latest law change, all OT/PT/Speech have to take a licensing exam.
Now, let's explain how this, timing-wise:
If I hadn't gone on Birthright in June 2003, I would not have gotten involved with the BRI Alumni Organization (the pre-Birthright Next group), and would not have met Michah and would not have heard about MDA Overseas.
If I had not heard about MDA Overseas, or if I had just found it without being able to talk to past participants, I would not have volunteered there.
If I had not volunteered there, I would not have had the group of people that I had to rely on when I made aliyah (and still have).
OT-wise: If I had gone to seminary or done something where I was one year behind in terms of finishing OT school, I would have had to take the exam. In Hebrew.
If I had made aliyah straight after finishing OT school in NY, I wouldn't have had my NYS license and would not have been eligible to get "grandfathered" in for my Israeli license.
If I hadn't made aliyah when I did, I would not have been able to get an Israeli license and would not have been able to not take the exam.
It's so amazing to me that I see so much of how I thought things were bad and they really turned out to be right.
For example: I wasn't able to graduate until June 2008 because there was a mix-up with my credits and I never got credit for courses I was exempted from. If that hadn't happened, I would have graduated on time, taken my exam earlier, and would have started working after Pesach, which would have meant that I couldn't be in Israel for the 88-hour and madrichim, and I would not have built up that network and made the connections that I did to enable me to make aliyah.
If I hadn't pushed my aliyah off to December 2009, I would not have had my roommates from ulpan (who are amazing), and I would not be living in the apartment that I am in, in the location that it is.
If I hadn't been in that course/cycle of ulpan, I would not have met the person who gave me the name and number of somebody at Misrad Habriut to sort all my paperwork out.
If I hadn't made aliyah when I did, I would have had to take the exam. And I would have taken it early, which means it would have been in Hebrew.
Thank you, G-d, for everything!
*In case you haven't made the connection yet, the MDA Overseas program is named for Yochai. He was the person who started the whole thing, and after he was killed the program was named in his honor and memory.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Customer Service, American-style
Customer service in America is usually decent, if not good, and if not, you can speak to a manager and just keep going higher up and get your problem resolved. In Israel, customer service is not known for its outstanding quality.
However it does seem to be getting better, I think? Maybe it depends on how loudly you yell. I'm not sure, because I might just be getting louder. But so far I'm usually able to get what I want, or a satisfactory option.
::pat on the back::
However it does seem to be getting better, I think? Maybe it depends on how loudly you yell. I'm not sure, because I might just be getting louder. But so far I'm usually able to get what I want, or a satisfactory option.
::pat on the back::
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
ושבו בנים...
Welcome home to the 245 new olim from the US and Canada who landed this morning on the first NBN #nbnlive flight of Summer 2011! According to the NBN video, there were 850 guests waiting to welcome the olim (can we just discuss-- I don't do math, but that's about 3.5 times the number of guests as to the number of olim!)
I get chills every time I watch a ceremony.
Mazal tov, bruchim haba'im, and WELCOME HOME!!!
Video here: http://www.nbn.org.il/live/
I get chills every time I watch a ceremony.
Mazal tov, bruchim haba'im, and WELCOME HOME!!!
Video here: http://www.nbn.org.il/live/
Thursday, July 7, 2011
"What is hardest to accept about the passage of time is that the people who once mattered the most to us are wrapped up in parentheses." — John Irving
*this is a very personal post...heads up y'all*
A couple of years ago I built a nightstand, painted it a medium sky blue, and I wrote quotes, including the above one, all over it with some picture fitting the quote.
I just finished a book this morning, and in it the protagonist has a line about something being a couple of years and two lifetimes ago.
This is my second time coming back to NY after making aliyah, and coming back here now feels like my life here was another lifetime.
Strange as this sounds, it was never so clear to me as when I was with someone who I once loved-- and still do-- and realized that since I made aliyah I have changed so much and that even if I stayed here, I could never be with this person. That realization hurt so much. How can it be that someone I loved so much and who loves me back...that we've grown, or I've grown, so much away from who I was that it couldn't work? I loved him for three years (?-- give or take--) and then made aliyah and changed. And still loved-- love-- him. It hurts. A lot.
After high school I didn't go to seminary-- I went to college and grad school. My friend Shana, who did and then made aliyah, came back to NY and we were talking. We got onto how we'd changed and she said something that really made me think. She told me that I'd really just grown into more of the person I was in high school. I sort of got it-- college (really just post-high school and living out of my parents' house) gave me a chance to explore what I liked and things that interested me and figure out what I wanted, beyond the walls of school and my home. If I think about the person I was then, I can't say that I've really just grown into more of the person I was then.
I've changed so much over the past 18 months, and I don't know if I went back in time, if I would really believe that the person I am today evolved from the person I was then. I...I don't feel Israeli, but at the same time I know that Israel is so much a part of me and that I could never not live there. I'm so conflicted about how I want my life to be: I want to raise my children in Israel, but at the same time I'm horrified by the education there. I want my children to be Israeli and at the same time be American-- and proud of both of their nationalities and absorb and understand both cultures. I want my children to serve their countries, and I'm ok with it being either. I hope to G-d that there won't be a need for my children to defend Israel, but if there is, I want them to do so willingly and proudly. I want to be able to be able to express my feelings to my husband in Hebrew and in English and not have to translate from either language. I want my children to grow up singing the folk songs of America and the classic songs of Israel.
Is that too much to want?
A couple of years ago I built a nightstand, painted it a medium sky blue, and I wrote quotes, including the above one, all over it with some picture fitting the quote.
I just finished a book this morning, and in it the protagonist has a line about something being a couple of years and two lifetimes ago.
This is my second time coming back to NY after making aliyah, and coming back here now feels like my life here was another lifetime.
Strange as this sounds, it was never so clear to me as when I was with someone who I once loved-- and still do-- and realized that since I made aliyah I have changed so much and that even if I stayed here, I could never be with this person. That realization hurt so much. How can it be that someone I loved so much and who loves me back...that we've grown, or I've grown, so much away from who I was that it couldn't work? I loved him for three years (?-- give or take--) and then made aliyah and changed. And still loved-- love-- him. It hurts. A lot.
After high school I didn't go to seminary-- I went to college and grad school. My friend Shana, who did and then made aliyah, came back to NY and we were talking. We got onto how we'd changed and she said something that really made me think. She told me that I'd really just grown into more of the person I was in high school. I sort of got it-- college (really just post-high school and living out of my parents' house) gave me a chance to explore what I liked and things that interested me and figure out what I wanted, beyond the walls of school and my home. If I think about the person I was then, I can't say that I've really just grown into more of the person I was then.
I've changed so much over the past 18 months, and I don't know if I went back in time, if I would really believe that the person I am today evolved from the person I was then. I...I don't feel Israeli, but at the same time I know that Israel is so much a part of me and that I could never not live there. I'm so conflicted about how I want my life to be: I want to raise my children in Israel, but at the same time I'm horrified by the education there. I want my children to be Israeli and at the same time be American-- and proud of both of their nationalities and absorb and understand both cultures. I want my children to serve their countries, and I'm ok with it being either. I hope to G-d that there won't be a need for my children to defend Israel, but if there is, I want them to do so willingly and proudly. I want to be able to be able to express my feelings to my husband in Hebrew and in English and not have to translate from either language. I want my children to grow up singing the folk songs of America and the classic songs of Israel.
Is that too much to want?
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Happy 4th! (part II), and unrelated notes
As an American-Israeli (and let's not discuss American-Israeli vs. Israeli-American; I was American first, but I wouldn't--couldn't-- live anywhere else but Israel), I celebrate two independence days.
I don't really find it a conflict at all, being both Israeli and American and celebrating the independence of both of my countries.
The days feel very different, though. Israeli Independence Day (henceforth abbreviated as IID) comes right after Yom Hazikaron, Israeli Memorial Day, and that really gives IID an...an added maybe (?) meaning, just because of the juxtaposition. American Memorial Day is completely separate from American Independence Day (AID; as a side note, there is also Veteran's Day and Flag Day in America...interesting). Independence Day in America is celebrated with fireworks, BBQs, and sales. Oh, and flag t-shirts. Those are very popular.
Unrelated Notes:
1. Onwards to being back in NY. The joys of Wal-Mart and lots of green mountains:
Wal-Mart. Please note the hugeness.
The mountains. Please note the greenness.
2. An interesting alarm clock that I would totally bring back, if not for the fact that, well...it looks like a bomb: here
3. I leave you with the song that makes me feel the most patriotic: "Proud to be an American," lyrics by Lee Greenwood:
I don't really find it a conflict at all, being both Israeli and American and celebrating the independence of both of my countries.
The days feel very different, though. Israeli Independence Day (henceforth abbreviated as IID) comes right after Yom Hazikaron, Israeli Memorial Day, and that really gives IID an...an added maybe (?) meaning, just because of the juxtaposition. American Memorial Day is completely separate from American Independence Day (AID; as a side note, there is also Veteran's Day and Flag Day in America...interesting). Independence Day in America is celebrated with fireworks, BBQs, and sales. Oh, and flag t-shirts. Those are very popular.
Unrelated Notes:
1. Onwards to being back in NY. The joys of Wal-Mart and lots of green mountains:
Wal-Mart. Please note the hugeness.
The mountains. Please note the greenness.
2. An interesting alarm clock that I would totally bring back, if not for the fact that, well...it looks like a bomb: here
3. I leave you with the song that makes me feel the most patriotic: "Proud to be an American," lyrics by Lee Greenwood:
If tomorrow all the things were gone,
I’d worked for all my life.
And I had to start again,
with just my children and my wife.
I’d thank my lucky stars,
to be livin here today.
‘ Cause the flag still stands for freedom,
and they can’t take that away.
And I’m proud to be an American,
where at least I know I’m free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.
And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘ Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.
From the lakes of Minnesota,
to the hills of Tennessee.
Across the plains of Texas,
From sea to shining sea.
From Detroit down to Houston,
and New York to L.A.
Well there's pride in every American heart,
and its time we stand and say.
That I’m proud to be an American,
where at least I know I’m free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.
And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘ Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.
And I’m proud to be and American,
where at least I know I’m free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.
And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘ Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Happy 4th!
Landed in the US of A in time for the 4th of July. Yay for long weekends!
I'm not jetlagged, except my body has to learn that Sunday in NY = weekend, not work. I got up at a perfectly normal hour-- if I had work. But I don't.
The plan is upstate, hiking, BBQ'ing. But it's raining, so that might change to upstate, Wal-Mart, swimming, BBQ'ing (it's supposed to slow down/stop later). Does this make me Israeli, if I'm going to hike and have a BBQ on Independence Day? Note, I'm not really going shopping...Wal-Mart doesn't count as major shopping/sales.
The flight was good, not too much turbulence. Got back, saw family, Andrea, Yoni, and Squish came over for Shabbos.
Really have to go-- more later!
I'm not jetlagged, except my body has to learn that Sunday in NY = weekend, not work. I got up at a perfectly normal hour-- if I had work. But I don't.
The plan is upstate, hiking, BBQ'ing. But it's raining, so that might change to upstate, Wal-Mart, swimming, BBQ'ing (it's supposed to slow down/stop later). Does this make me Israeli, if I'm going to hike and have a BBQ on Independence Day? Note, I'm not really going shopping...Wal-Mart doesn't count as major shopping/sales.
The flight was good, not too much turbulence. Got back, saw family, Andrea, Yoni, and Squish came over for Shabbos.
Really have to go-- more later!
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Another difference between the schools in NY and the schools in Israel
Wednesday we (the entire country of Israel) had a missile drill. There was a national exercise in case missiles are shot all over the country; it was also a test to see where people heard the sirens and where they didn't or it was difficult to hear it.
There were two sirens-- one at 11 am and one at 7 pm. During the 11 am siren, I was at work in one of my schools. We took all the kids down to the miklat (shelter) and they were down there for 10 minutes. During the 7 pm siren I was in my apartment and briefly contemplated going down to the miklat to see how it looked all cleaned out. I nixed it, because I'm sure it just looks empty. In addition to the purpose of the drill was to see where sirens could/could not be heard, it was also to make sure people know where a close-by shelter is.
There was also a shelter drill in one of the schools I worked in in NY. It was pretty simple-- they rang an alarm/bell, and everyone went to stand in the hallway, facing the wall. Theory being it was away from windows. It was also that you could do a specific number of shelter drills in lieu of fire drills.
Speaking of, they don't seem to have fire drills in the schools here, nor are smoke alarms and carbon monoxide detectors standard in apartments/houses in this country. But we have national missile drills. WTF?
There were two sirens-- one at 11 am and one at 7 pm. During the 11 am siren, I was at work in one of my schools. We took all the kids down to the miklat (shelter) and they were down there for 10 minutes. During the 7 pm siren I was in my apartment and briefly contemplated going down to the miklat to see how it looked all cleaned out. I nixed it, because I'm sure it just looks empty. In addition to the purpose of the drill was to see where sirens could/could not be heard, it was also to make sure people know where a close-by shelter is.
There was also a shelter drill in one of the schools I worked in in NY. It was pretty simple-- they rang an alarm/bell, and everyone went to stand in the hallway, facing the wall. Theory being it was away from windows. It was also that you could do a specific number of shelter drills in lieu of fire drills.
Speaking of, they don't seem to have fire drills in the schools here, nor are smoke alarms and carbon monoxide detectors standard in apartments/houses in this country. But we have national missile drills. WTF?
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Working
OT in the schools here is very different than OT in the schools in NYC. For starters, there is more than one kind of public school here. And there are separate schools for special ed as well. As in, their own building.
But the most annoying technical thing (besides figuring out which kids should be getting individual OT), I find, is the paperwork. Every kid gets the Israeli equivalent of an IEP at the beginning of the school year and a full report at the end of the year. That's right, it's like doing a triennial review for every kid every year. Now, which kids get the reports depend on the school. For example, in one school I have two classes that I see only a few kids in each class 1:1; I am responsible for reports on all the kids in the class anyway. In another school I have one class session that each child gets a certificate about what they worked on in the class session and how they did, and the rest of the time see kids in small groups or 1:1 and write a report for each kid. It comes out to about 40 reports total, plus the certificates. In Hebrew. More on paperwork when I'm not about to pass out and can't focus.
INSANE. And I used to think that IEPs sucked. I really long for the days when I was a DOE therapist and had just...so much of a more functional schedule.
But the most annoying technical thing (besides figuring out which kids should be getting individual OT), I find, is the paperwork. Every kid gets the Israeli equivalent of an IEP at the beginning of the school year and a full report at the end of the year. That's right, it's like doing a triennial review for every kid every year. Now, which kids get the reports depend on the school. For example, in one school I have two classes that I see only a few kids in each class 1:1; I am responsible for reports on all the kids in the class anyway. In another school I have one class session that each child gets a certificate about what they worked on in the class session and how they did, and the rest of the time see kids in small groups or 1:1 and write a report for each kid. It comes out to about 40 reports total, plus the certificates. In Hebrew. More on paperwork when I'm not about to pass out and can't focus.
INSANE. And I used to think that IEPs sucked. I really long for the days when I was a DOE therapist and had just...so much of a more functional schedule.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Interesting birthday cake
I enjoy baking. We know this. And cooking, too, but baking is really my thing. I'm into pretty cakes and cookies and decorating and all that stuff.
My latest cookie accomplishments were Israeli flags and various "boy cookies"-- aka, teddy bears and baby carriages in shades of blue. I think those are the latest. Latest cake accomplishments were a multi-color celebratory cake and a grenade cake.
Now for those of you not in the know, there are different kinds of genades, some more fun (shall we say...) than others. Of course I didn't know that people have preferences for favorite kinds of grenades (although people have favorite foods, why not favorite grenades?) so I made a traditional hand grenade. I will advise people that flashbangs (stun grenades) are much simpler to make. Here's how:
1. Make the housing (the case): Take a toilet paper tube and cover the ends so the tube is closed at both ends
4. Don't forget the pin! I used a keychain ring attached with the batzek sucar.
Next time I will plan better. Although the cake tasted good, the decoration definitely needed more planning.
My latest cookie accomplishments were Israeli flags and various "boy cookies"-- aka, teddy bears and baby carriages in shades of blue. I think those are the latest. Latest cake accomplishments were a multi-color celebratory cake and a grenade cake.
Now for those of you not in the know, there are different kinds of genades, some more fun (shall we say...) than others. Of course I didn't know that people have preferences for favorite kinds of grenades (although people have favorite foods, why not favorite grenades?) so I made a traditional hand grenade. I will advise people that flashbangs (stun grenades) are much simpler to make. Here's how:
1. Make the housing (the case): Take a toilet paper tube and cover the ends so the tube is closed at both ends
2. Color it black (this can be done in a variety of ways, but I think the easiest would be to color it with a marker and then saran-wrap (plastic wrap) it so the color doesn't get on the cake. I suppose you can also dye it with food coloring, but then it would be significantly wet).
3. Make the top (the detonation assembly): This I made out of batzek sucar, which is kind of somewhere in between fondant and marzipan but not exactly either, and painted with food coloring.4. Don't forget the pin! I used a keychain ring attached with the batzek sucar.
Next time I will plan better. Although the cake tasted good, the decoration definitely needed more planning.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Shavuot-- aka, the holiday that vegetarians and those that do not like to be meat appreciate
Shavuot is the holiday that comes at the end of the counting of the Omer. People stay up all night learning and pray as early as possible. And in Jerusalem many people walk to the Kotel, the Western Wall, to pray there. That custom comes from a few sources, one being that once the Old City and the Western Wall were were liberated, Shavuot was the first time we were able to go there, and there is also a concept of making a pilgrimage to the Temple 3 times a year (Pesach/Passover, Shavuot, and Sukkot). Between these two, it's become a tradition on Shavuot to go to the Kotel on Shavuot morning after staying up (or not) learning. My favorite part of Shavuot morning is after davening. At the Kotel plaza, there are people making kiddush and giving out small packages of food (muffins/cake, a drink, etc.). And you leave the Kotel, by all the construction (ok, maybe less so now) and the beginning of Yafo, there is also-- you guessed it-- someone (a few someones) making kiddush and giving out cake and stuff. This country is amazing in the way that people take care of each other and how on major event days, someones are looking out for the rest of the population somehow.
Another tradition is eating dairy, for many reasons (see the link for Shavuot above). So I made lots of dairy. I ended making dinner last minute, so I made lots of dairy. Aside from challah (which is not dairy and I love to make), I made a dairyfest: cinnamon cheesecake with nutmeg in the crust, lasagna, a dairy noodle kugel, and pizza. And then I went to lunch by a friend of a friend and-- surprise! Dairy! I like dairy. Dairy makes me happy. Except when I'm meat (hence the reason I don't like eating meat).
Usually (like I've been here so long...well, usually what I do when I'm in Israel-put it that way; I've been here for 3 Shavuots) I stay up all night, go to the Kotel, and then go back to wherever I'm staying and SLEEP. This year I had a friend over and she didn't feel great, so we stayed home. I stayed up most of the night and learned, davened, then went to sleep until the afternoon. In the afternoon we went to a NBN unofficially singles event ("This event is for singles and young couples in their 20’s & 30’s", which means it's a singles event). On one hand, it's another singles event. On the other hand, I see a whole bunch of people at once and then I'm "yotze" for a whole year. That's convenient.
What I used to do for Shavuot was determined by where I was. If I was upstate, after we finished dinner I would go down the hill (with a pint of Ben & Jerry's and enough other candy and cheese balls to last through the night, sit at the back of the nightclub (the nightclub is really an auditorium-like space with a stage that serves as the shul for the main minyan on Shabbos in the summer) and learn with Chari and maybe a few others, take plenty of breaks in the middle, pass out for a little while on the benches, get up, then daven and go back up the hill and sleep. If I was by a friend's, we would usually go to her shul, learn, eat, daven, then go back to her house and sleep until the afternoon. And then in both scenarios, have a regular second dag of Yom Tov.
Another tradition is eating dairy, for many reasons (see the link for Shavuot above). So I made lots of dairy. I ended making dinner last minute, so I made lots of dairy. Aside from challah (which is not dairy and I love to make), I made a dairyfest: cinnamon cheesecake with nutmeg in the crust, lasagna, a dairy noodle kugel, and pizza. And then I went to lunch by a friend of a friend and-- surprise! Dairy! I like dairy. Dairy makes me happy. Except when I'm meat (hence the reason I don't like eating meat).
Usually (like I've been here so long...well, usually what I do when I'm in Israel-put it that way; I've been here for 3 Shavuots) I stay up all night, go to the Kotel, and then go back to wherever I'm staying and SLEEP. This year I had a friend over and she didn't feel great, so we stayed home. I stayed up most of the night and learned, davened, then went to sleep until the afternoon. In the afternoon we went to a NBN unofficially singles event ("This event is for singles and young couples in their 20’s & 30’s", which means it's a singles event). On one hand, it's another singles event. On the other hand, I see a whole bunch of people at once and then I'm "yotze" for a whole year. That's convenient.
What I used to do for Shavuot was determined by where I was. If I was upstate, after we finished dinner I would go down the hill (with a pint of Ben & Jerry's and enough other candy and cheese balls to last through the night, sit at the back of the nightclub (the nightclub is really an auditorium-like space with a stage that serves as the shul for the main minyan on Shabbos in the summer) and learn with Chari and maybe a few others, take plenty of breaks in the middle, pass out for a little while on the benches, get up, then daven and go back up the hill and sleep. If I was by a friend's, we would usually go to her shul, learn, eat, daven, then go back to her house and sleep until the afternoon. And then in both scenarios, have a regular second dag of Yom Tov.
Friday, May 27, 2011
it's been 2 weeks...
ok, 17 days technically since I updated. Sorry.
So-- Yom Ha'atzmaut. Oh, and Lag Ba'omer. And fairly soon, Yom Yerushalayim and Shavuot.
So-- Yom Ha'atzmaut. Started the night off by doing an avtacha at a street party that ended up getting closed early by the police because there were too many people there (why they didn't just not let anybody else in when it got full is asking too much from Israelis). So I went home at 2 am instead of at 4 am, which was fine with me. The avtacha was supposed to start at 11, so I figured that I would have to be there at 10. No, the volunteer office called me and said I had to be at the station at 9. We left the station at 9:45. Next year I'm going to a BBQ instead. During the day I went home (oh, I made flag cookies. Yummy flag cookies) and Rita and Dov had a party in the afternoon, then I went back into Jerusalem for a BBQ-- kind of a winding down because everyone already BBQ'd during the rest of the day.
Lag Ba'omer was, as usual, a pyromaniac's dream. I went to the NBN bonfire, and next year I will be going to the MDA Chul one. Josh made one, which would have been awesome to go to, but I didn't know where it was and he didn't answer his phone. And I forgot that I had Gavy's number, who I also could have called. But on the upside, at least I didn't try to find it because as Gavy put it-- "it was on top of a hill where you would think you would be raped and dumped." Right. Next time I'll call Josh in advance, or someone else. I definitely have bonfire pictures somewhere.
What else, what else? Getting ready to wrap up the school year. I'm going to be in only two schools next year (thank goodness). I'm going on some Fridays to sort of get acquainted with the new school for next year so that I don't come in with a total surprise and actually start working well. Like I said, it will be interesting because it's a population that I haven't really worked with, and it's also a high school, so there's a very big element of getting ready for life in the community, which should be kind of cool.
And Vered made aliyah! Yay! Mazal tov and welcome! Joint pancake birthday party to happen in the near future.
I think that's about it. I really wish I had more to say.
Oh! I can talk about dating here. Over the past couple of weeks I've gone out on a few dates. Nothing came out of them, but at least I went. And some of them were with Israelis...yay for me! That being said, still looking...and I'm open to suggestions (within reason; don't think about setting me up with a 35 year old, or someone who isn't religious, or doesn't speak a word of English/Hebrew-- yes, they've all been done...)
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Mmmmm, bbq...
I smell like the classic Israeli smell on Yom Ha'atzmaut-- a BBQ. More on this later, but Yom Ha'atzmaut celebrating the 63rd birthday of Israel has come and gone, with all the fanfare and fun it deserved.
Bedtime, as I go back to work tomorrow.
Bedtime, as I go back to work tomorrow.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Yom Hazikaron
Last year I didn't post about my experiences; I later posted a poem, which I've linked to here.
American Memorial Day didn't mean much to me beyond sales and a day for BBQs. Now that I think about it, I'm sure it meant much more to my Grandpa and Zaidy (and maybe also my grandmothers) who knew people who fought and died in the wars of America. I'm sure that if I went to Arlington, or any other military cemetery, I would feel it more; I would recognize the day for what it was intended to be. But I never did. I didn't feel it in America; I don't know if I would if I went back.
When I was growing up, Israeli Memorial Day was always observed in school, but I never really made the connection of Memorial Day being right before Independence Day, really impressing the significance. People DIED-- DIED-- so that there could be an Israel. Somehow...I never really felt the "people DIED so that there could be an America." Here...everyone who was killed was a friend or relative of a friend or a friend of a friend. I would be surprised if there was more than 2 degrees of separation between someone who was killed and anyone walking around Israel today...it's so close for everyone.
Last year I and another ulpan student were invited to carry a wreath for Natan Sharansky as he placed a wreath at the memorial ceremony for victims of terror. It was surreal, as I was walking to the ceremony and during, listening, and after, walking around Har Herzl...just...it felt like a memorial day, a day to remember. The night before I went to a ceremony with Elinor and Aryeh and on the way there was the tzfira, the 1-minute siren that marks the start of Memorial Day in Israel. Aryeh stopped the car, we got out, and stood. Remembering, reflecting, thinking, and paying respect to those who died for Israel.
There's also this...interesting (?) thing-- I don't know the right word for it. It's...kind of like a large-scale kumsitz. It's called "shira b'tzibur"-- "singing in a congregation" where there are songs put up on a screen, like in karaoke, and everyone sings together. They are old songs, traditional Israeli, war songs, hopeful songs, sad songs...and they are songs that are part of the culture here. And this shira b'tzibur is very...customary (?) on Yom Hazikaron and random other times. Everyone is sitting together, usually on mats on the floor or chairs in front of the screen and everyone sings together. Sometimes there are instruments, sometimes not. But it's amazing; it's just everyone sitting together and singing, being a group.
You feel a heaviness in the atmosphere here-- the country is in mourning, and you feel it. It's like when somebody you know dies and the world should stop and you're walking around in a haze because everything feels so thick. Except in this case, the whole country does stop, because everybody is thinking about somebody.
American Memorial Day didn't mean much to me beyond sales and a day for BBQs. Now that I think about it, I'm sure it meant much more to my Grandpa and Zaidy (and maybe also my grandmothers) who knew people who fought and died in the wars of America. I'm sure that if I went to Arlington, or any other military cemetery, I would feel it more; I would recognize the day for what it was intended to be. But I never did. I didn't feel it in America; I don't know if I would if I went back.
When I was growing up, Israeli Memorial Day was always observed in school, but I never really made the connection of Memorial Day being right before Independence Day, really impressing the significance. People DIED-- DIED-- so that there could be an Israel. Somehow...I never really felt the "people DIED so that there could be an America." Here...everyone who was killed was a friend or relative of a friend or a friend of a friend. I would be surprised if there was more than 2 degrees of separation between someone who was killed and anyone walking around Israel today...it's so close for everyone.
Last year I and another ulpan student were invited to carry a wreath for Natan Sharansky as he placed a wreath at the memorial ceremony for victims of terror. It was surreal, as I was walking to the ceremony and during, listening, and after, walking around Har Herzl...just...it felt like a memorial day, a day to remember. The night before I went to a ceremony with Elinor and Aryeh and on the way there was the tzfira, the 1-minute siren that marks the start of Memorial Day in Israel. Aryeh stopped the car, we got out, and stood. Remembering, reflecting, thinking, and paying respect to those who died for Israel.
There's also this...interesting (?) thing-- I don't know the right word for it. It's...kind of like a large-scale kumsitz. It's called "shira b'tzibur"-- "singing in a congregation" where there are songs put up on a screen, like in karaoke, and everyone sings together. They are old songs, traditional Israeli, war songs, hopeful songs, sad songs...and they are songs that are part of the culture here. And this shira b'tzibur is very...customary (?) on Yom Hazikaron and random other times. Everyone is sitting together, usually on mats on the floor or chairs in front of the screen and everyone sings together. Sometimes there are instruments, sometimes not. But it's amazing; it's just everyone sitting together and singing, being a group.
You feel a heaviness in the atmosphere here-- the country is in mourning, and you feel it. It's like when somebody you know dies and the world should stop and you're walking around in a haze because everything feels so thick. Except in this case, the whole country does stop, because everybody is thinking about somebody.
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